Thirteen Ways To Cope≫ ImmortalHD

1- eat regularly

First he wanted me to eat regularly.

For some unknown reason this surprised part of me; maybe it was just he fact he had to pay attention to notice that about me. Then again it wasn't hard to figure out I didn't eat regularly, I hadn't for a while now.

I ate only when my stomach was growling, and desperate for food. Even then I still didn't eat enough; only the amount needed for me to carry on.

I wasn't on some sort of health craze diet that meant starving yourself either. There wasn't anyway I'd do this to myself simply for beauty purposes. After Eddies death, food had lost all taste , and eating had just become bothersome.

I didn't like it so I figured why do it anymore, maybe it'll help me leave this terrible place sooner.

So I lived on eating when necessary; figuring no one would ever notice it. Apparently he had though. He had bothered to pay attention to me long enough to realize I wasn't eating hardly, and that I was growing thinner by the minute. Maybe that was part of the reason why he had created this list for me; he was scared for my health.

Why he'd be concerned though?

I'd never exchanged any words, or even looks with him until now. I knew he was friends with Eddie, but I don't think they were too close. I had been dating Eddie so I would think if he were anyone of importance I would have been introduced.

I guess maybe they weren't friends; just acquaintances.

I sigh, not quite satisfied with my assumption, but figure it'd be okay for the time being. Now though it was time to at least try to eat as I was hungry.

Slowly the lunch line moves forward all the kids holding out trays for whatever food there was today. I had opted out of the normal school lunch, and chose to get a chef salad because it held more food my body needed.

As I take a seat at a table in the cafeteria I try and eat but can't manage to force the limp lettuce down my throat. I bite my lip wishing for a way out of this dilemma. The feeling of someone staring makes me look down at my food in pity.

Stabbing some lettuce with a fork, I slowly bring it up to my mouth. I eat it trying to enjoy the salad or at least act like I enjoyed it. I didn't though, it still tasted bland actually it didn't taste like anything at all to me. Sighing I keep forcing myself to eat, but remain careful not to over stuff myself.

The next day eating is a little easier, but part of it is because I brought my own food. Now I was standing at the schools microwave wishing the the ramen noodles would cook faster. Being in the middle of the cafeteria wasn't something I was used to so having people looking at me was rather never racking.

Finally it beeps and I collect my food before scurrying back to my table located in a far corner of the cafeteria. My backpack rests in a chair there and my binders are stacked on the table to show the table was occupied.

Taking my seat again, I look at the bowl of noodles that seem a little appetizing. Grabbing a spoon I take a bite, and surprisingly I taste something. Smiling a little I finish off the noodles with sometime.

Sure it wasn't the healthiest thing to eat, but it was better then nothing. As I pack up my stuff and get my notebook out I wonder if with each passing day it'd get easier. I wonder if I continue to make myself eat if I'll get a little further out of this darkness.

At the sound of the bell I scurry back to my locker where I stash my lunch pail and begin collecting my things. A small piece of folded up notebook paper on the ground catches my eye, and I lean over to pick it up. Once I set my school stuff back in my locker; I unfold the note and read it. In sloppy pencil there's a single line of words that read:

Good job, keep it up :)

That was it, a good job for eating. I look around wondering if it was him, but know that it was him as no one else cared. For the first time since Eddie, I feel a little happy.

.

.

a/n
I feel like I'm gonna fuck this up.
Bad.
I'm trying