Jump (Bucky Barnes)

Screwed

One fucking month.

One fucking month since they all went to kill Thanos and they discover that the stones were gone forever, all the hope of the team was gone and we didn't know what else to do or how to help people around us that doesn't know what was happening. Maybe it was the end for everyone and everything we knew, the people that was missing, the people that we didn't know if they were dead or in another place was now a mystery and something that keep us with an eye open thinking that they can return, I have the hope that they'll return eventually.

 I couldn't stand by myself for a long time, Steve told me James' last word was "Victory". His last thought was me and that made me feel worst, he was worried about me while I was on the floor fainted, I should have fight more, do something, even try to kill Thanos.

And now I'm alone at my flat in London, every place in the world feels lonely without the half of the population, some of my neighbors where gone, partners, friends, and luckily I didn't have family left to be worried about, but all was grey without James and the other Avengers that were like a family to me and being in a place I lived with two of them for a while was not helping.

I was filling my mug with coffee while I opened my computer looking for inspiration for making something, a drawing but nothing was coming out of my mind. They said (especially Steve) that we have to move on, live and try to be happy again for them, maybe while the time goes on we are going to find a way to solve it but, how do you move on when all you had just disappear with a snap? 

My phone rang making me jump on my seat and I saw Steve's name on the screen and I turned it off, I can't deal with people right now. I saw the photo I had framed with my first picture with James, I took it by accident. I was taking selfies when he got into my room and he appeared hugging me and giving me a kiss on the cheek. God, I'm trying to be strong for him.

My life was quite normal before meting James and Steve, well, I am a little bit famous in the art world but it was something normal for me. When I was little I used to paint for keeping me thinking about anything else than my life or how I didn't have a family or someone who loves me in a real way. I build all my life from dust, miserable dust that people left and barely helped me to start my career because they felt pity about my life. A scholarship in a god art school, social media, contacts, every person I met throw my entire life were the ones who helped me to reach what I wanted and it's where I am now, but I wouldn't give them all the credit, I was the one who decided to try to have a better life than the one the social service woman said I was going to have. 

All was incredible, but something was missing for months since I launched my last collection and I traveled around the world, it was nothing the same as the beginning. My art was not that interesting than before for me, well it was amazing and everybody loved it, I love every paint I did but nobody was trying to get the message or trying to figure it out when they saw it, they were only excited for having something with my name on it and pay a lot of money for that for people to know that they can afford it and say "I have a Victoria Allen's piece" The world was not the same for me and I was losing hope of making another collection or show it to the world, they didn't deserve something as beautiful as that if they can't just feel it. I was about to give the message to my assistant to send it to the media.

But a few weeks later, a message changed everything for me and for the future, they had chosen me to make a paint for the famous Captain America for the museum on his honor at D.C and they wanted a paint from amazing and famous artist that could make people visit it, so here I am, trying my best on something that it's important for all USA and maybe for the hero himself if he someday see it. 

I was standing in front of my own paint searching for a mistake, but it looks amazing in the wall, it was better than I imagined it would look and it makes feel proud of myself, the message was clear and maybe the people might feel the same chills I have right now, he was an amazing soldier and someone who totally deserve all this, although many soldiers should have the same credit, this could be the beginning to thank all the people that had sacrificed their lives for the nation, a nation I'm not part of but it could help for the other countries to start doing it. They gave me a photograph of Captain America with the famous Bucky Barnes, his best friend, they said it was an amazing friendship and the only thing I new was that the guy was dead because of an accident, poor handsome good looking man, he was an amazing person (based on what information I could find on the internet) that could have make so many amazing things and be a big hero as Steven Rogers. I decided to paint it and make it colorful, only them, the rest of the background was black and white. The hero having the support of the people he care about and the reason why he's on the war.