Bodyguard University: I Hate Loving You

The Hottest Mistake

I was such a loser. Who the hell was still a virgin as a senior in college? Honestly, between studying and training, I didn't have time to consider dating or trying to get laid. My father frowned upon drinking, so I hadn't brought home any regrettable one-night stands. And no one at school had caught my attention. Sure, there were little crushes here and there but nothing serious that I'd pursue.

But I'd kept that part of myself fairly well hidden. Phupha was convinced that I'd slept with more people than him. I had my suspicions that Phupha was a virgin too, but I didn't mention it to him. Even so, the attention I got from guys at school was enough to keep the door of possibilities open that I was getting some major action. Sadly, that wasn't the case.

Lost in my thoughts, I almost didn't notice that creaking of the door slowly opening to my room. There was only one person who had a key besides me.

I inhaled sharply, not bothering to turn around and face the bastard. "Get out."

If he knew what was good for him, he'd run away while he was still thinking. That bruise I gave him hadn't satisfied me.

"It wasn't me," Kinn said gently. The door clicked shut, redarkening the room as the hallway light was hidden. I hadn't bothered to keep any light in the room. Oddly enough, Kinn hadn't turned on a light upon his entry.

Flickering on a small lamp light on my desk, I turned around, my arm resting on the back of my chair. My gaze searched for the fuzzy, pale body standing across from me. "Is me being your bodyguard really so terrible?" I asked him flat out.

Kinn looked hesitant, like he knew what he wanted to say, but he didn't know how to say it.

"For what it's worth, I've fucked many people, and it's really not all people make it out to be," Kinn said, avoiding my question.

I would've pestered him further, but that remark made me too irritated to think. I didn't care about his past, no matter what the sting in my chest told me. I wouldn't let him get to me like this, showing off how cool he thought he was for sleeping around like some slut.

(Author's Note: Porsche, let's not slut shame, please.)

"How the fuck is that supposed to make me feel better?" I asked angrily, fists curling, waiting for the nearest target to hit.

Kinn shook his head and took a step closer. "I'm just saying...It really doesn't mean anything unless you're with someone you truly care about. So, it's nice that you've waited this long," he explained.

I rolled my eyes. I'd heard that sentiment many times before, yet society still pressured to have sex as if was more important than air or water. No one thought it sweet to be waiting. They viewed it as weak or thought there was something wrong. Plus, most people my age had at least some experience. It'd be weird to sleep with someone now when they expected at least some level of competency.

"If you really feel that way, then why do it so many times?" I asked, not really wanting to know the answer. I didn't know why I didn't want to know. I just had a feeling. It was a queasy feeling, a scary one.

Kinn chuckled. "A man still has his cravings, no matter the reward," he answered shamelessly.

I wanted to spit in his face. "You're disgusting," I hissed.

By now, Kinn was less than a meter from me, staring at me with an amused expression and hands in his pants' pockets. My heart stammered, sensitive to his proximity.

"If you're so upset about this, why don't you just have sex with someone?" Kinn suggested as if it were the most obvious solution.

"Wait, that's brilliant! Why haven't I thought of that before?" I asked sarcastically.