Giving Up [DISCONTINUED]

4

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Dear Journal,

It's like the universe hates me doesn't it?

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Dear journal,

Is God just creating a test for me? I feel like I'm failing it.

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Dear journal,

I learnt something from the test you've given me.

Everyone always leaves

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Dear Journal,

My heart aches everyday I wake up.

My muscles are worn out and sore from everything.

I thought that football and piano could be a distraction from everything.

But it's just not working out for me.

I quit football and piano.

And I'm thinking about quitting dance.

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Dear journal,

I walked into the studio and I immediately felt a large weight being put onto my shoulders.

I walked up to Mrs. Alicia and I couldn't say anything. I just broke into tears and she just embraced me into a hug.

Marlene tried to comfort me but I just pushed her away. I hate that bitch.

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Dear journal,

I visited the hospital to see her again. I held her hand and sung her favorite song. I know she would like it.

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Dear journal,

I hate talking.

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Dear journal,

I don't like to talk anymore. It just feels like there is a huge weight on my chest and shoulders. I just feel suffocated by everything around me. People ask if I'm alright. I just nod distantly and walk away.

I wonder how long it will take for me not to communicate to anyone anymore.

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Dear journal,

Hayes and Nash called. They asked if they could sleep over. I said they could, because why not?

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Dear journal,

Hayes and Nash told me that they're going to buy an appartment to be closer to her. Hayes says he misses Jess.

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Dear Journal,

I stopped talking to isaac