All I Want For Christmas Is...Not You

Day Twenty-One;

I decided to get up before Wes so I could make a coffee run.  And it was an excuse to clear my head.  His faint whisper echoed through my brain, constantly bouncing around to remind me.  It took three words.  Three simple words for me to spend time with Wes.  "Want to bet?"  But those three simple words changed.  They weren't so simple anymore.  They turned into something else.  Something complicated.  "I love you."  And that's it.  Three words to make me absolutely numb.  I feel the same way towards him, but something inside of me keeps telling me not to bring it up.  I didn't know Wesley was even capable of this type of love.  Of course, he loves his family and friends, but nothing so intense.  I think he may have thought I was asleep when he told me, or he may have thought I didn't hear it.  But I heard it, and it's all I've been thinking about.

                When I got back to the house, everyone was gone to work and Keaton was probably still asleep.  I walked quietly up the stairs, hoping Wes would still be sleeping.  I opened the door as silent as possible, but to my surprise, Wes was up.  I sat his keys on the dresser, and he scrambled off of the bed and rushed to me.  "I thought something happened to you." he breathed and pulled me into a tight hug.  I wasn't able to hug back because of the two coffee cups in my hands.  "I just went to get coffee." I muttered and he pulled away.  I handed him his cup.  "I tried calling you, and then I realized you forgot your phone."  He calmed down and took a sip.

I sat my coffee down, and pulled my jacket off.  "Yeah, that was an accident.  I didn't think you'd be up." I laughed nervously.

                "Keaton woke me up asking about something.  I was pretty much dead to the world." he let out a soft laugh and sat on the edge of his bed.  "I thought I may have scared you off." he muttered.

So he knew.  "I didn't think I was supposed to hear that."  I joined him on the edge of the bed.

                "No, I wanted you to hear it or else I wouldn't have said it.  I care about you a lot, Anna.  And you don't have to feel the same way."

Oh, but I do feel the same way.  "I care about you, too, Wesley." I smiled.  Why couldn't I just say it?  It's the perfect time, and he wouldn't be expecting it.  Just do it, Anna!  I mentally fought with myself.  He wasn't disappointed when I didn't say it back.  I pulled him in for a small kiss, which turned into a long, yet passionate one.  "I'm tired." I sighed and kicked my shoes off.  He moved to the top of the bed, and sat his coffee on the bedside table.

                He rested his back against the pillows, and gestured for me to come to him.  I climbed across the bed, and cuddled close to him.  I rested my head on his bare chest while he played with my hair.  "You can go to sleep." his voice was soft. 

I looked up at him, "Sing to me?"

He nodded and sends me a smile.  I looked back down, and closed my eyes.  I felt his fingers run through my hair, and his fingers would touch my neck on occasion.  He started to sing, and I think I fell asleep before he finished the song.

Waking up a few hours later, alone, was not what I wanted to happen.  It was dark, and the sound of the rain pounded against the roof.  The sound of thunder made me jump, and I let out a small scream.  I didn't know it was loud enough to carry through the house.  A concerned Wes comes bursting in the room, and he rushed to my side.  "Are you okay?"

I nodded and turned on my side away from him.  "I hate thunder storms, you have no idea." I had to laugh at myself.  It's kind of childish, but it's true.  I remember cuddling with Amy when I was little because I couldn't sleep with the rain.  Now I tune it out, or wait for it to be over.  "Why did you leave me?" I asked in a joking childish tone.