GUYS IN A BAR

"Because of thirteen! You asked for thirteen shots!"

"Yeah! Thirteen! The strongest argument in the Bible! A dozen angels betrayed by the rat! Let's greet these angels!" Ivan said and raised the next glass. "Everyone who's doing shots is in need of a friendly wing under the howlly moon! Cheers, Mike!"

"Cheers! Speaking of flying objects and the moon I want to ask you something!"

"Be my guest!"

"Have you noticed some smelly part from the angels' activity concerning your life-being?" Mike said.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean that you could travel thousands of miles by yourself and not for a second feeling alone but you could see someone regularly for a couple of years and nothing. You can't feel that man! Do you understand?"

"You're telling me I'm the totally nothing for you!" Ivan said.

"No! We're fine! I feel blessed when we see each other. But probably our angels work together, you know!"

"I know what your point is! Infact I passed through this same thing, too! You mean that even the buddy is just like you you can't rock his world and he can't yours, either!"

"Yeah! That's just what it is!"

"I'd help you to investigate your experience!" Ivan said. "Let's start from the beginning! You've got primary needs. For example: eat, sleep and learn. But it's not necessary to put it in that order and, of course, you could have different priorities. For example: eat, sleep and shit! Understand me?"

"I see. But we are talking angels, you know!"

"We'll get to the angels part! Just give me a second!" Ivan reached for a glass and took a shot. Mike followed him. "Now! Most of the people who include 'shit' in their primal priorities, I mean consciously or subconsciously, had been deluded, I mean accidentally or on purpose. Our planet's population is growing impetuously and I'm not sure that people's growing needs could be satisfied so fast! So, it's easier to preach 'shit' from all possible channels because visiting other planets from shitholders seems very far in the future. At some point in your life you got convinced that 'shit' is better than 'learn'. This is the time when your angel gives you the finger!"

"But if I'm really sorry and change my priorities back?" asked Mike.

"You know," Ivan said "to be an angel is a job like any other job and you can't trespass into forbidden territories. The finger is one of the worst violations in the angels' code! Following God's Will one thousands devils are automatically released armed with one hammer and two nails because of the low budget, you know, and when your angel flips the bird at you, his wings are instantly nailed to the ground!"

"I must have a way out of the mess?" tried Mike.

"Yeah! There is a way! You to become a subject, or a living-dead, if you insist to be punctual!"

"What does it mean?"

"It means that you're not anymore a proud holder of your own stuff because now, from this moment on, they own you. It usually starts with your key. It comes as the bad feeling you'd lose it. That's why you hang it on your neck. Of course, if you are nearsighted, it all begins with your glasses. Then there is your job or your school if you're a student. You relish, admire and revere more than ever. There is a definition for your mental condition and it consists of one word only. You're becoming sentimental. You find out new understandings of some words like 'here' and 'there', 'appear' and 'disappear', 'life' and 'death'. Karma starts pulling you by the nose and you see signs. These signs help you to rewrite the story of your life again and again. Every day you are a different personality. Today a king, a beggar tomorrow and you don't forget that the other day you were a monk. And so on. I guess the readers are curious why have I invoked a thousand devils to play that dirty trick on you. So, would you be so kind to remind me your pancake story?"