It was beautiful, summer day. I was listening my favorite song, laying on the ground. I was filling so save. I was alone, my parents was at my cousin house. I have all day to myself, I was very happy about that.
Then my friend call me.
Friend: -HELLO!!!
Me: -uh no need to yell. What's up?
F: -I FOUND A NEW FRIEND ON THE INTERNET!!
Me: on the internet?
F:-YES! He is so nice and understand everything. AHH he is the best.
Me:- new friend on the internet? How many you have this "friends"? You can't even count them. You shouldn't make them so many.
F:- ugh, don't be so stiff, you should make one. You don't rigret that.
Me:- yea, I think about it.
F: good, welp I gotta go, clay call me.
*end call*
I was thinking that's dumb. You have so many friends in real life. I wasn't even going to think about it.
I go to my room, lay in my very comfy bed and fall asleep. I don't even know how long I was sleeping. I was dreaming of world that was make all of chocolate.
I wake up because of some noises.
#whats that?#
I get up. Then I saw my parents arguing. I don't like seen them like that. My mother was yell at all house. I didn't want to interfere, so I go back to my room. I feel so terrible that I can't say a word. I start cry and I don't know what to do with myself. Then that thought came.
"Maybe I should try have a first friend online?"
I make an acc on TikTok and make one, that's say "hi! My name is Emily and I'm 10 years old, wanna be friends?"
Then one guy text me on the messenger. He say that he is 12 and his name was krystian. I really like him. He was a funny guy. I can talk to him all day and don't get bored. He was my everything, i fall in love with guy that I don't even know. That was so unbelievable. I just don't understand how. I can tell him all my problems and he help me with them. He even celebrated my 11 birthday with me! On the FaceTime of course.
We were dating like a 3 months . We were talking about things that a normal ten years old shouldn't. I was knowing every thing about sex, masturbation and things Like this at ten years old, because of this dude.
Then we just stop talking, and every problem come back. I wasn't crying about him. Everyone knows that being friends on the internet ends at all.
It's been a couple months ago from this. I was going to 5th grade. I was so happy, then my best friend Amelia came to me.
A:hey!
Me: HELLO!! *hugs her*
A: what are you doing pathetic? *punch me off*
Me: uh? Weren't we friends?
A: we? Friends *laugh* never.
She Punch me on the wall. Then her friends came. They beat me, telling me things that I never heard. I was so scared. One was 14 year old. He kissed me like a French kiss, I bite his tongue, then he slapped me, i was crying so much, but they don't care. I came home witch some bruises, my mother don't give a shit. I was crying all night. That was the day that my life is getting worse.
-time skip-
It was going to be a great day. I was going to meet my cousin weronica. I haven't seen her awhile. I was so excited. She is a beautyful girl, have a long Brown hair, and very big, blue eyes, I love looking at them. I clean my room. THEN SHE FINALLY CAME. I hugged her. We were playing a lot, going for a walk. It was fun. Then it was going dark. She tell me that she have something to tell me.
Then she show me her wrist. There were so many scars on them, I was so scared. I don't know what to say. After a long moment looking at this I spoke up.
Me:why? Why you do this to your self?
Weronica: because this help me with my problems. I even like doing this. BUT! don't tell anyone it's our secret.
Me: oh, okay I won't.
All night I was thinking how that's help with problems. Hurting yourself because of problems? Aren't that's another problem. I have so many questions and don't have answers.
Then that one night. My parents were fighting, my brother yell at me because of nothing. And people at school.. they put my face in the toilet. I WAS SO MAD AT EVERYONE THAT DAY.
So I call weronica and ask her "what were you cutting your self with?"
Then she tell me "sharpener blade"
I get one sharpener and I took the blade out of the sharpener. I never forget the day that I do it for the first time. It was hurting but.. it's hurt so good. At the moment I forget all my problems, I focused on the pain. It was beautyfull. I turned the little, night lamp, thats always stood on the shelf next to my bed and hide the razor blade there.
HELLO! It's the first episode I hope you like it. I know it's not perfect but it's gonna get better!
910 words.
