𝐈'𝐦 𝐬𝐨𝐫𝐫𝐲 | 𝐒𝐚𝐧𝐨 𝐌𝐚𝐧𝐣𝐢𝐫𝐨

Special Chapter

I've been busy with school so I don't really know if I can continue this story. But here is a special chapter for those who have supported me and likes this book. Thank you so much!

Kawatsumi Kasa's earliest memory would probably be her parents fighting. Whether it be because of lack of money, her father's infidelity, her mom's jealousy, she would always put up with it since it was a normal occurrence for her 

But the start of their fight would always be because of her, she was born because of her mom's selfishness. Her mom was a dancer in a pleasure house but she never sells her body for sex however her mom fell in love with her dad and used wicked deeds just to tie him down.

She seduced him and got pregnant then use it as leverage to threaten him into a marriage.

Their life after marriage was, as expected, a nightmare.

Marriage didn't stop her father from visiting brothels, he was rarely seen at home and would always get home late every night drunk and full of kiss marks.

At first, her mom was livid in jealousy and they would argue almost every night, then she became depressed and started drinking to escaped reality. 

Cozbi was also ignored at school, no, he wasn't ignored. She was their school symbol of a "bad household". Her schoolmates avoid her because her parents didn't love her so she must be a bad child. Her teacher didn't pay much attention to her and even felt dislike because of her parents.

She was completely isolated. She was always alone. She was just six.

Her mother being depressed was just the beginning of it all. Her mother directed her anger towards her husband to Cozbi. At first, she would only verbally attack Cozbi and told her that it was all her fault, that if she didn't exist she would've never had to suffer like this. As a six years old child, it was too much for her heart to handle, she would always cry to sleep every night in a cold floor in the living room.

Then her mother became extreme and started to assault her. It was just a pinch at first but then it turned into slapping and became way too violent.

One night, when her mother was assaulting her. She heard her say that if she was dead everything would've been better

And so, Cozbi went into their school's library and found a picture book where the villain was killed by a hero. 

[The villain was made a villain because of trauma that was caused by the people around them...]

["I'll free you from your suffering," said the Hero as he took out his sword "May you find freedom and happiness in death"]

The death of the villain saddens her but the word freedom and happiness in death is causing her to titillate into tasting it

Is death really that good? Thought the six years old girl.

But she never gets to taste it as when morning came the next day, her mom who was always haggard and disorderly were now dressed up and even put some make-up on. Her mom was beautiful with an innocent appearance if she dolled herself up 

That day, her mom was gentle and kind as she took her hand and told her that they'll play in the park. She just quietly nods and went with her and silently looked at the ice cream in her hand as her mother sat her on the bench of the park.

"Wait here for a bit, ok? Mommy's gonna go and get something" She didn't answer but her mother didn't care and left her there.

Cozbi just sat, silently licking the ice cream in her hands until she finished it. She left the bench and started walking without any particular place in mind. She wasn't dumb, she didn't know the word abandoned but she knew that her mother would never come back.

After that, she met her grandpa and her older brother who took great care of her. She felt love for the first time but they weren't able to save her from her overwhelming thoughts that a child should not have 

There was a time when she was standing on the river bank just blankly staring at the water flowing freely down the river then she met a boy who was smaller than her sucking on a lollipop with his hands in his pockets 

"Do you want to jump?" She flinched when she heard his question, not sure if he was talking to her because he was looking straight towards the river but they were also the only people here. Unless of course, he could see ghosts then that would be creepy.

"I don't want you to jump" She let out a sudden what, surprised by his conceited remark. "If you wanna die, then die when there's no one in the vicinity" She tilted her head to the side puzzled by his words 

"Vicinity?"

"It means life" She beamed in admiration as she learned another word.

"Then what if there's no one in the vishwinity?" The boy looked at her then touched his chin as if thinking hard 

"Then give your life a purpose, like finding someone" She copied his form earlier and also touched her chin, thinking hard. Should she find her family? No, if possible she doesn't even want to see them. She pouted and sulk when she didn't have anyone to find.

"How about finding your soulmate? It doesn't exist so you'll probably have to find it forever which means you'll have to live forever right?" The boy smirk as if he just said something wonderful while the girl beamed and jumped up and down while nodding at the boys' words

"Right! Right! You're so smart! You're so awesome" The boy just tch in annoyance and prepared to leave but the girl suddenly grabbed his hands 

"Wait a minute" The boy just silently watched her as she keeps on digging at her hello kitty backpack before abruptly turning her head towards him with twinkling eyes while presenting something with both her hands 

"What's that?"

"Dorayaki"