lessons [wk]

- 01

"i don't know if it's a good idea," he breaks the silence, his voice tainted with uncertainty. i let go of the breath i was holding, overly thankful that he said something.

"ugh," i throw my head back with a groan, "do you have any hot guy friends who i can give my number to," i pull out my phone, getting ready to write the list of names im expecting him to give in my notes.

"what?"

"well i need someone to learn this stuff with, and you're off the table, so now i'm asking if there's anyone else you know who would be willing to take your place," i explain the situation to him, confused why he's not following.

"oh," he shakes his head with squinted eyes, trying to shake himself out of his own thoughts. "yeah i think all the friends that would be down to do that are with someone right now, but i can check for you."

"great thanks," i smile at him while standing. i move past him and pat his shoulder quickly as i walk. my feet halt at my bedroom door, my hand grasping for the handle. "thanks for considering it!" the door shuts and i make my way over towards my pc. i figured i could call one of my friends and play something in the spare time.

i didn't mind that weston said no. it would be ridiculous of me to expect him to say yes. considering our long friendship, it was obviously a possibility that weston wouldn't want to risk.

but maybe something about the idea of fooling around with me excited him, and he just couldn't figure out why. he was probably completely down with letting me 'use him' as i said in the offer. the pure wording of the opportunity had to have made his mind wander.

he must've known it would change things though. friends with benefits relationships hardly ever work out correctly, and i didn't want to lose our bond.

at the same time, my mind was fighting with myself over the fun it could be. he didn't know i've never been with a guy before, and just thinking of him being able to watch my reactions to little things got my mind going.

he went for the logical answer instead of the answer my body wanted, and was probably strangely surprised when i didn't care. honestly, even i was.

i've called three of my friends asking to play valorant with them, none of which answered. with a huff of frustration i open my stream-labs instead, and decide to just go live for the next couple of hours.

i set everything up, skipping the starting soon screen and just moving directly into just chatting. i stream regularly on twitch, usually once everyday. which, as i've found, really makes subs go up.

a lot of my friends share the same audience as me, but aksel and i really have the exact same viewers. that's why i made the deal with him to never go live at the same time as the other. if that ends up happening, one will always have a significantly low amount of viewers.

i average around 1,500-2,500 viewers, and i love it like this. i have almost have 3,000 subs now, and the community that my chat has is always something i love seeing.

i make small talk with your chat, fidgeting with my hair tie against my wrist as i do so.

i hear the door open quietly, scaring me a little bit. sometimes when i stream i forget there's other people around. westons figure comes into view, a distressed aura circling around him.