Secrets & Treasons

Fourth Movement: Ellen | Unexpected

With the color back to his cheeks and his breathing back to normal, White Tiger could almost have forgotten all about the conversation he had had with Little Feather only a few minutes before.

But then it came back, searing, brutal, destructive. His pain. Like a tidal wave, as beautiful as irreducible. It immobilized him on the spot. And suddenly, nothing mattered anymore, because nothing was real. Nothing but her. A destructive fire ignited in him and it seemed as if he would be totally consumed from the inside. It was so hot that the pain became metallic. Curled up in his pain, he couldn't tell how long he had been hurting like that, it could have been a minute or an eternity. He was no longer aware of the outside world, his eyes turned inward. So, he was not aware of the hand that, catching his, forced him to walk, mechanically, directing him as one guides a blind man. When his gaze finally rested on the outside world, the pain giving him some rest again, he realized that he was in a tiny space, like a closet, and that Little Feather was looking at him, with a gentle and understanding look.

"Is it better here?"

"It's come back to me again! My God, Pep, what's happening to me? I'm sick, aren't I?"

Little Feather still didn't say anything.

"Damn it Pep! If you know something, anything... Tell me!" he said, grabbing Little Feather with his hands and starting to shake him.

That's when he saw troll hands shaking his best friend. His hands. He looked at them without understanding. Staring at them, trying to analyze what his eyes were telling him: he had troll hands, troll skin, troll complexion, troll hair! He stared at his friend, a plea in his eyes.

Little Feather was smiling weakly now. He nodded, as if answering the question White Tiger didn't dare ask out loud...

"Yes", he finally said. "You're a troll now."

"Tro...? What? What do you mean, I'm a... troll... now ???? How can that be! I'm an elf! I've always been an elf! I was born an elf !!! I can't... it's not possible... why?!! Answer me!"

"Look, it's complicated and I can't... tell you..."

"Huh? You can't tell me ? Why can't you tell me? Who's stopping you?"

"That's not important, Monsieur, you want your body back, right?"

"Of course, I do!"

"So, stop whining, concentrate and do what I tell you!"

White Tiger calmed down suddenly and regained control of his nerves. He seemed ready to listen carefully now.

"Here, it hurts less, doesn't it?"

White Tiger nodded in agreement.

"Then you have to go where the pain comes back."

"You're crazy!" cried White Tiger. "If I do that, it's going to be worse than anything! I can't control myself when that happens! I could run into a wall without realizing it! Or fall down some stairs and break my neck!"

"It's the only way!"

"What? W... wait... has that ever happened to you? That's why you say that, right? You know what's gonna happen, right? So, will you come with me? Will you?"

"No," said Little Feather categorically. "But you have to trust me. And you have to do it alone."

"That's crazy! And why would I do that?"