Slipping Away (Erik x Raoul)

Ch 1

1

He was all Christine could have ever wanted in a man. Raoul was sweet, charming, caring. She could tell, however, that he was drifting away from her. He loved her, he told her. And sometimes both of them believed it. She wondered if his love was as romantic as she hoped. She didn't think so.

He was a beautiful man, she never could have doubted it. A beautiful, kind, wonderful man. The nicest, most loving man anyone could ever meet. Just not towards her. Sure, he was always respectful to her, never less than kind. But Christine could tell, despite how she tried to fool herself, that her lover had been less affectionate recently. No, she realized, he had never truly been so. Had she messed up? Didn't he love her anymore? 

2

Raoul liked to think that no one noticed. When he spent time with men, mostly attractive men, he would pretend that no one knew. And if they did— which they did not, not that he told himself— they turned a blind eye to it. No one could see the way he looked at his fellow man. He had a wife. He was not gay, men were simply far too distracting. And beautiful.

The opera ghost was not beautiful. Raoul knew this. But still, the mystery and rumors intrigued him far too much. It was an obsession with the darkness because surely no creature like that could survive in the light, and surely no man of the sun and day could ever love said creature of darkness. That is how the Vicomte knew that it was only an obsession. One that, hopefully, would pass soon. No, he knew that it would pass. It had to.

He would catch the monster. Monster? That didn't seem right. The phantom was not a monster. Sure, he had affected Christine, making her stay with him for weeks. And sure, he had major problems interacting with anyone, but he was not evil. He had never hurt Raoul, nor Christine, and as long as it stayed that way, he was free to admire. Why did Raoul want to catch such a talented man? Maybe he did not want to turn him to the police for any human crime. Rather, love him for him and steal his heart. No! Raoul didn't yearn for men.

He knew it was untrue. Yes, he had always found his male friends more attractive. Yes, he would occasionally fantasize about being in a relationship with men. He loved Christine, though. She was perfection. Beauty. All things wonderful, but she was upset. He didn't know why. He would consider it later. For now, he had to remind himself that liking men was something all men did.

3

"Christine, darling, what's wrong?" Raoul asked when he saw her that day. She looked at him, her eyes tired and her mouth in a small frown. " 'Darling?' I had nearly forgotten that you ever call me that."

"Something has you upset, Chris, what is it? I know you were happier before. Please, tell me what it is. Can I do anything for you?"

"Do you love me, Raoul? Truly love me?"

"Darling, I do. I love you with my whole heart. No exceptions."

"Then why don't you act like it?" Christine bit her lip. She looked so tired.

Raoul was at a loss for words. He did act like it, didn't he? He loved her. Couldn't she see it? He still loved her. He always loved her. He watched as she looked away in seeming embarrassment. Who was she embarrassed for? He knew it deep down that it was for him. She saw through his disguise of a normal lover. Christine knew deep down that he yearned, not for her, but for the very one that was causing her so much trouble in the first place.

Christine knew (though at the moment Raoul himself did not) that Raoul was in love with the Phantom of the Garnier, and not her. Never her. He had fooled himself, but he did not fool her.

When would Raoul figure that out? Hopefully soon. Christine was getting fed up with him. He kept ignoring his own feelings and she knew it was becoming destructive for the both of them. She needed a way to push him, to show him that it was okay. Even though she knew he couldn't love her, she was okay with it. She would let go of him. Maybe she already somewhat had.

She needed him to know she wanted him to be happy. She wanted the best for him. She played the perfect girl. She pretended that she was upset at him but... She loved him, really, but she loved him so much that she couldn't truly love him. She loved him as a brother, She realized.

She needed a plan as well. Somehow to make Raoul realize that he wouldn't hurt her. Leaving wouldn't hurt her. She may need a few days if it were to happen, but it would all be okay. She would be okay. He would be okay. Hell, maybe even Erik would be okay. Everything would be alright. She might need time. She decided to speak with Raoul the next day.