Seungjin: Hold Me Tightly

what actually happened 2

Junbi shakes her head while cynically smiled. "I want to marry your son as my payment."

I laughed. What? This clown really said she wants to marry my son? In front of me..? His mother? What a joke?

"Listen, here. Young girl, my prince Hyunjin will be marrying my choice, Hwang Yeji. I appreciate your work, but now please leave my office before I call the security." I smoothly giving warning, not trying to raised my voice or what.

Now its her turn to laugh too. "I will go. But no matter it is, Hyunjin is going to be mine. Keep that in your mind!"

With that she left.

After a few months, Hyunjin and Seungmin finally gets back together. I feel so wrong letting him suffered like that again.. as a mother..

I want to see him happy in his own way, not because I chose my own happiness for him.

But Junbi went too far and start to go crazy around medias again. Thats why I decided to see their agency and politely ask them to take action before I issued the company.

Luckily, they listen to me and take actions. But what's making me such a fool is... When Junbi went crazy again.

And seeing Seungmin in that state.. make me feel like I'm the one who should be in that prison.

(End of flashback)

"So I am so shock when I heard from your members that Junbi attacked Seungmin yesterday. I'm sorry, I did not know she will go this far. I'm sorry. You can hate me, son. I know its hard for you to forgive me. Even I, myself cant forgive myself for this. What happen to Seungmin is bad, and if its not because of me-"

"Mom. Look, no. Dont blame yourself. I forgive you."

He cut me off and said those. I cant accept this!! He cant forgive me for ruining his happiness.

"But, I-"

Hyunjin hug me. Shaking his head. And let go of me after that. "No one's fault. I forgive you and please forget everything. Just.. just pray for Seungmin thats all." He said.

I can see every emotions he is trying to holding in for himself. Even his smile did not shines like its usually is.

"Mom, you can go home now. I'm going inside, Seungmin is waiting for me."

Looking so fragile, emotional breaking. Thats how I see Hyunjin. My son, Hyunjin.. he just look like a body without a soul.

He step away to go inside the room where's Seungmin was warded.

_________________________

*Hyunjin's POV*

Call me stupid or everything, I'm not going to feel offended. I'm the real culprit behind your pains.

First, I let them bully you at the school because you want to be friend with me. We finally became friends, but the bully gets worst and you go through such a hard days everyday.

Second, I let you down by putting aside your feelings and chose my family traditions. I never care about you until I know about your departure. You moved out and change your number. I was an asshole, I'm sorry.

And last, now. This! You're in this state also because of me, I let my mother and Junbi plotting things behind me. I dont know why you still love me Seungmin?

Why? Why?! I dont deserve you, baby. I really dont deserve you at all.

I grabbed my hair, put my ankle on my knees and closed my eyes, regretting everything.

Feeling depressed. I know Seungmin is stable and all fine but untill now.. I cant believe in all this.

"Jinnie,"

I know, I'm dreaming. He is still sleeping.

"J-jinnie.."

Crap! He calls me for real?! I lift up my head and saw Seungmin was struggling to sit up.

I immediately ceased him from doing so and put him back, lying down.

"Dont move around. You need more sleep, baby." I said, fixing his condition to a more comfortable one.

"I'm fine." He said. His voice is a bit low due to a long sleep.

"No, you're not." I said while fixing his blanket.

But then he took my hand stopping me from being busy, pretending busy.

I look at him who is looking at me.

"You saved me, again. Thanks, jinnie." He smiled.

I just deeply stare at him. His cold hand is still holding mine. I cant help my heart, he said I save him when the fact that I made him hurt even more.

Later on, I can feel Seungmin thumb on my cheek, caressing it softly. No, he wipes my tears away with his thumb. When did I cry?

"Stop crying, jinnie. I'm okay." He smiled again. This time more brighter.

That is my Seungmin. Always shines the most in my darkest time.

"I'm sorry. Really sorry." No matter how it is, my guilty wont leave me.

He shakes his head. "Its not your fault. Dont be sorry."

"But-"

"You're always said sorry if something happens to me. I hate the you who always blame yourself. Please, give me chance to look at Hyunjin who is waiting for me to wake up from my sleep just to say good morning and not to say I'm sorry. Can you?"

I just stare at him. Did not know how can I react, his pleading eyes and the way he is still holding me.

I slowly curve a smile that its hard to, and nods.

I kiss his forehead and both his cheeks. "Good morning, love. But it still midnight now. So, you need to sleep again."

He just giggles. Cutest giggles I've missed the most.

"Enough." I smiled. "Go to sleep, goodnight. Baby."

He nods before spread his arms up. I ask with my eyes.

"I want cuddles." He said.

I chuckles, touched with Seungmin's cute action. I snuggle beside him, share his blanket and cuddles with him.

Patting him slowly, sing us to sleep. After a few minutes, Seungmin finally fall asleep. I still pats his back. Kissing his forehead not taking my lips away from it, staying like that until I dont even realized when I'm fallen asleep too.