Meant to Be

Chapter 12

"I knew I don't stand a chance with Rhylee the second you two started talking about dragons." He started to explain. "It's true. I liked her a lot but it was obvious that you charmed her the second she sat down and I don't blame you. You didn't do it on purpose. We can't control attraction."

Was that a faint smile on his face?

"And thank you for blaming yourself for what happened between you two that night. I'm glad you didn't put the blame on her even though she was the one who made the first move." He winked at me.

"W-what?" I wasn't sure I understood what he was saying.

"When she told me that you slept together, she told me that I shouldn't blame you because she came on to you." He explained.

She said that? She really said that?

"It doesn't matter." I shook my head. "I could still say no and I didn't."

"Would you say no if I didn't like her?" He asked.
"That's beside the point, Bill."

What kind of a question was that?

"I hurt you and it doesn't matter if she made the first move or not. I didn't consider your feelings. I know that now. I just wish...I just...I miss you so much, Bill. I miss my big brother and my best friend." I bowed my head.

A tear ran down my face again and I wanted to hide it. I didn't want to cry in front of him again.

"Then what in the bloody hell took you so long to talk to me?" I looked up at his frowning expression. "What did you think I was going to do to you? Hex you?"

"You can still do it if it'll make you feel better." I wanted to smile but I didn't know if I was allowed.

"I told you that I'm not mad at you. I'm disappointed. Disappointed that you lost yourself so much in your guilt that you didn't come to me immediately and tell me. Disappointed how you involved our whole family in this nonsense drama because you couldn't face me. Disappointed that you thought that I would never talk to you again or whatever was going through your head." He ruffled my hair.

I was dreaming of this moment. Thinking about it over and over. What he would say to me. How much he would shout. I imagined him punching me in the face. But none of it happened. He was so calm and so quick to accept my apology. How could he be so good?

"Did you think I stopped writing to you because I was mad at you? Because I didn't want to talk to you?" He pushed me aside and walked over to his desk. "If you think so, then you're delusional."

He opened one of his desk drawers and took out what looked like a big pile of letters.

"You think I didn't miss you? Miss talking to you? Spending time with you?" He pointed to the letters and I slowly made my way to the desk.

There had to be more than 50 letters scattered all over the table. They were all addressed to me. He wrote to me but never sent them out.

"I just wanted to push you to come and see me. To talk it out brother to brother. I didn't know you would need 2 bloody years to do it." He slammed a hand against his forehead.

"Family comes first, Charlie." He said with a gentle voice. "I forgave you a long time ago, I just wish you came to me sooner and not torture yourself so much about it."

I didn't know what to say. He forgave me? I was left completely speechless, going through the letters. I wanted to sit down and read every single one of them.

"I just wanted to teach you a lesson." His voice barely audible. "I wanted to show you that what you did wasn't right and yes you hurt me but you hurt me, even more, when you didn't come and talk to me."