the Best of Us and the Rest of Us

07

vii. splatter

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  I felt like a piece of meat, being circled by vultures as I sat in the lounge room. My knee bounced uncontrollably as though I was trying to break the tension of Landon's stare. He sat on the couch across from me; I could barely look at him as it was, feelings of humiliation and regret still crowding my head from Sunday night. All of this made it feel like no one had said anything for hours when it had barely been minutes. 

  Austin cleared his throat from the corner of the room, moving both mine and Landon's focus, turning my attention to where he had propped himself against the wall. There was no chance that Landon was this comfortable with him being in our space if he wasn't in on these dealings, but I had to make sure either way, "Is he part of the ..."

  "The mafia?" Landon finished. I nodded slowly, my mouth suddenly dry.

  I barely ever said that word out loud, as though it would summon the scary men in black suits that terrified me when I was a kid. I was still young when I started figuring out something was going on with my father. I realized that the frequent appearances at our house were not a normal thing. And the way my mom would take me up to her bedroom to watch a movie when they were there wasn't to stop me from disturbing them but rather to keep me away from them. It terrified me completely when my mom tried to explain it to me once I started asking questions, telling me they were bad men who could hurt my dad if he didn't do what they said.

  I had been going through a Harry Potter phase at the time. So she told me that, just like Voldemort, if I never said their name out loud, they would never be able to find me. Looking back on it now, it was probably just a means to make a kid keep a secret. And now it was all just unnecessary superstition. But just in case it wasn't, I still kept the word out of my mouth.

  "Austin, Cameron, and Izack are all associates," Landon continued, "Just like you. Just like me."

  Izack. That was a new name. I assumed he would have been the guy I had seen outside the house when I first came around. I wondered if he had mentioned that encounter to the other boys. But they didn't bring it up, so I didn't ask.

  I relaxed a little. So everyone in this room was on the same page. At first, I thought it was strange; they were all the boys I met during beer pong, plus Izack. But it wouldn't be surprising if these guys were only close with each other. My dad was like that. The only person he was properly friends with was Bryce and one other guy who was also an associate. He never truly trusted anyone else enough.

  The silence seems to make the vultures circle again. As much as I understood their need to be cautious, I didn't exactly feel like the threat in this situation. So it seemed like my turn to break the tension, "Do you know why they called me in? Why am I here?" 

  "No, not yet," Landon started as he stood up, walking toward the cupboard underneath the staircase, his voice quietening as he disappeared inside, "But usually, when they bring someone new in, it could be big."

  "What are you studying?" Austin asked,

  "Visual Art and Business," I answered, making the two boys exchange looks as Landon exited the cupboard, a yellow envelope in hand, "Is that relevant?"

  "Probably not," Landon tried to brush it off, but how quickly the words came out of his mouth, clearly something wasn't being said, "Until then, they will be sure to keep us busy."

  Landon tossed the envelope at me. Landing in my lap, the envelope was heavier than I thought it would be. I looked between the two boys quizzically before opening it up. Inside, there was a phone, identical to my current one.

  "New phone?" I asked, turning it on. But scrolling through, the phone had nothing on it, besides a few contacts.

  "If this one rings, you answer, company policy." Austin joked, "Also, it'll be the only phone you bring with you, on jobs at least."

  "So, what is your story, blondie?" But all of our attention was drawn with the sound of the front door slamming open, followed by heavy footsteps quickly approaching the lounge. 

  I felt my heartbeat quicken. Was it someone here for me? I had shown up, just as the man had told me. Maybe they had decided his leniency was not warranted, that I had not earned any favors from them. Trust it to be me, fucking up without doing a single thing.

  "Izack, what happened?" Austin asked as the stranger entered the room. I recognized him instantly. I had seen him from outside the front of the house. My shoulders relaxed as much as they could in the already tense setting. 

  "Fucking bullshit." He murmured, dumping the duffle bag on the countertop. Despite the apparent frustration in his words, Izack seemed relatively calm. 

  He looked across the kitchen counter, at where I sat on the couch, and I felt my body freeze, "Sorry, I didn't realize we had company." 

  Blood was splattered across his face and his white t-shirt. Just when I thought I was finally settling into this idea of my life now, it just became too real in a very short amount of time. Of course, blood wasn't new to me. But it was going to be my problem for the first time. Not my dad's. Not Bryce's. Mine.

  My eyes shifted from the blood back to his face, his words drawing my attention, "So you're who we have all been waiting on? Better late than never." 

  His words were still strangely calm, although I couldn't help but feel there was still something more behind them. Was I supposed to have gone with him? Was that why I was supposed to have shown up yesterday?

  "We'll talk about this later," His words were directed to the other boys, "I'm going to get cleaned up." Izack glanced at me one more time before heading toward the stairs, an uneasy feeling making its home in my chest.

  "He shot someone ... didn't he?" I finally managed to get out, the sound of Izack's footsteps disappearing up the stairs.

  "Yeah, but just a little bit," Austin said casually, receiving a glare from Landon, "What? You can tell by the spray."

  The idea that I would slip into a new normal disappeared quickly. Sure, the boys seemed concerned about Izack and the blood. But not nearly to the extent it made my heart race in my chest. 

  It seemed that the small amount of hope I held disappeared. It was stupid to think that everything would make sense once I walked through this door, that the pieces would fall into place, and I would simply slip into a new everyday reality. Instead, I was greeted by a world that was strangely out of my depth. One I had been faced with my entire life and yet had never confronted.

  "I should go," I muttered standing up, my feet carrying me toward the door before I could give it a second thought.

  "Kennedy, wait," Landon called, but I didn't stop, and he didn't chase after me. 

  It was strange how entering this house took me so long, yet I couldn't get out of there quickly enough. Leaving the house, I checked my phone, seeing Eden had sent a picture. It was of her and Jess getting ready. 

  The floor party, I had almost forgotten. I stared at it for a long moment and replied against my better judgment.

<room for one more? I could do with a drink>

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