The Forgotten Duchess

Chapter Forty-One | Lost

"Vivienne," the earl said courtly as he stood when she approached the table. A footman assisted her into her chair, and she spread her napkin graciously just like Agatha had taught her.

She was aware of the countess' eyes on her as she waved her hand, indicating that the footmen should bring in the first meal. Vivienne sat stiffly as the first soup was brought. It was creamy and thick, not her preferred style so she took smaller sips, something the countess caught onto quickly.

"Is it not to your liking?"

Vivienne raised her eyes from the soup to look at the countess, seated across from her at the table. Her dark eyes bore into Vivienne's, and she quickly lowered them back to her meal, "it is fine," she said politely.

She avoided the countess' gaze and instead looked at her uncle. He did not say much, as he ate his food quietly, ignoring both his wife and her as well. The sounds of cutlery could be heard through the room and Vivienne tried her best to hide the wince. Even the days in which the duke and her were not on the best terms, it had not felt as cold as this.

If Lady and Lord Westmorland's marriage was how most English aristocracy behaved, had her parents been the same? Had her father been happier after the death of her mother? No, she refused to believe that. She did not have many memories of him, but when she closed her eyes, she could imagine his smile, as warm as the summer rays.

"Did my mother—"

She watched the earl straighten at her question, and she paused her words, "I mean, I saw a picture of her in the gallery—of the two of them. Did they have a good marriage?" she blurted out.

Vivienne saw the confliction in her uncle's eyes, but she did not know why. Meanwhile, across from her the countess seemed to holding her breath, waiting for an answer as well.

"I was not around much because of my army duty—"

His words trailed off as loud footsteps rushed into the dining room, "It's not fair!" Grayson shouted and his gaze found hers. "Why does she eat with you, and I cannot?"

The boy stomped his foot hard on the floor, anger evident in his green eyes. She did not miss the nervous look between the butler and the footmen regarding the disruption.

The countess' eyes flashed looking at her son, "What are you doing here child? Where is your governess?"

The same woman Vivienne had seen earlier in the morning came rushing behind, apologizing profusely. "The young master just slipped out for a moment."

The earl looked at his son and then the governess, "See to it that it doesn't happen again." he said, before returning to his meal. The two were evidently dismissed.

Tears formed in the boy's eyes and Vivienne's heart sank. Grayson's parents were alive and yet they did not give their child the attention he craved. Had her father done the same to her? Is that why he had sent her away? Or had he deeply loved her, and there was something else that tore them apart like James believed.

The governess tugged on Grayson's hand, but he refused to move. His angry eyes found Vivienne's and she almost flinched at the hatred she found within them. "I hope you go back to wherever you came from you wrench! You will never steal my parents."

She and the governess gasped at his words, but it was the earl's thunderous tones that shook the room, "Grayson, apologize to your cousin and get back to bed at once!"

Vivienne could see how her uncle had been in the army. The authority in his voice was clear, and he did not waver for a second. She looked at the little boy, her cousin and she understood some of his pain. He thought she was replacing him. Ignoring decorum, she pushed her plate away and stood before making her way to Grayson. She bent her knees so that she was eye-level with him.

"It's okay to be angry and scared," she whispered.

He looked away with a small humph, even as his lips wobbled with his father's command.

Vivienne sighed. "I'm not trying to take away your parents Grayson. I would never do such a thing."

When the boy's gaze showed that he refused to believe her, she went on, aware of all the other eyes on her. "I lost my parents when I was much younger than you. Your parents have merely been kind enough to let me stay here for a bit. I'm hoping that we can become friends."

There was still distrust in Grayson's eyes, but she saw the anger fade away slightly. He did not say anything for a moment. It was going to take a while for her to build trust with him, Vivienne realized. But she would do it, because if one thing life had taught her, was that there were never enough people to love and befriend.

"Master Grayson," the governess said hesitantly. "Shall we go upstairs now?"

Grayson seemed conflicted but his eyes drifted towards his father. Whatever he saw in them made him nod quickly. He took the governesses outstretched hand and left the room silently. Vivienne stood and returned to the table. She felt the countess' eyes boring into hers, as well as the earl's dark gaze. The atmosphere in the room dipped even colder.

Swallowing the bile in her throat, Vivienne turned to them. "I am not that hungry this evening, may I be excused?"

The countess opened her mouth to say something, but the earl nodded before his wife could respond. Curtsying to both, she left the dining room. No sooner had she set a foot outside the room; she heard the countess begin speaking.

"What I simply do not understand is why she has to live with us? Your heir seems quite unhappy with her, and I, for one, am in agreement."

"What was I supposed to do Priscilla? Leave her on the streets like some common whore? She is my brother's blood, and as an extension, my blood."

Vivienne barely stopped herself from gasping aloud as she covered her mouth, heart hammering. She was unsure on how to feel.

"Well, it might be best of find her a suitor and marry her off then," the countess said haughtily. "At least then she'll be out of our hair."

The earl did not say anything to defend her against his wife. Vivienne could only assume he agreed with the countess' plan. Warm tears slid down Vivienne's cheeks. She slowly turned around and began climbing the stairs. It was only when she reached her room that she let the waterworks flow. Her sobs shook the rest of her body, and she wrapped her arms around herself.

Her dress was wet, and Millie would have a difficult time removing the stains, but Vivienne did not care. She was not wanted at the Earl's house either. She had been naïve to think she would have another family to count on but everything she had seen in the earl's household let her to believe that it was a cold and dark place.

For a brief moment, she wished she was back at the duke's house, but he hadn't wanted her either. She had understood why James did not propose before knowing that she was Lady Selina, but he had let her go after that as well. She was foolish to have rejected Captain Gronow's marriage proposal, but it was too late now. The captain had left, and she had no prospects.

Vivienne forced herself to crawl into bed, pulling the sheets closer. She did not bother to change her clothes. Her body felt too heavy and exhausted from the day's events. Would anyone ever want her? Had her parents even wanted her? Or would she be forever alone, shifting from one place to another, and nothing to call home. 

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It seems that things might not exactly be rosy at her uncles house... :( Do we feel bad for Vivienne?