Hateful Desire

Chapter 38

I am not sure what is going on, but it is making me uncomfortable. I want to ask why they all are in this state, but I hold back from being too pushy.

"Daph, let's go lay down." Adrian nods to the blonde. She shrugs and follows him out of the kitchen and up the stairs.

"I need to take a walk." Blaise announces. "I will join." Theo agrees.

The room becomes aggressively quiet as just Pansy, and Draco are left with me. I am not sure if I should continue to eat the baked good based on the energy in the room.

At this point the negativity has become too prominent that it would probably be odd if I didn't question the behavior from everyone.

"Is everyone alright? You all seem...upset?" I ask hoping that I can maybe get some clarity.

"Why do you need to know absolutely everything broken paragon?" Pansy spits at me. She turns on her heels and immediately exits the room. I hear her going up the stairs of the apartment to leave me alone with the silent blonde.

He takes a minute but finally raises his head a little to look at me. This gives me more of a view of his face. He looks...horrible.

"Draco, what happened?" I ask again.

He sighs, "Don't worry. Business is not going well." His voice is weak.

I purse my lips and chew the side of my cheek as I try and analyze his answer.

"Come, let's eat. You had a hard night." He motions to the food.

I take a seat in one of the chairs cautiously watching him to make sure he is truly okay. He decides to sit next to me in silence as he watches me eat the rest of my croissant.

No more words are spoken between us for the next couple of minutes. I am the only one who eats, and it makes everything even more uncomfortable.

He finally breaks the silence in the air, "Do you mind if I leave you? I think I need to lay down for a while." His voice is shaky and weak.

"Yes of course."

He gives me a false smile but nods leaving me alone in the kitchen. I sit quietly thinking of the past half hour.

What happened this morning that made everyone so upset? I do not want to pry, but it seem as if it has affected the group greatly.

With everyone either in their rooms or on a walk outside, I decide to spend this quiet time studying. I walk back upstairs to the bedroom and open the books I had packed.

Waves.

Waves crashing.

Water dissolving.

I think of my mother. I think of Cedric. I think of Dean. I think of Harry. I think of War. I think of Cormac. I think of Graham. I think of it all.

If I choose to ignore it from my training, then I will only fail. I need to feel it all.

I move from book to book with different training methods behind the practice. They all have been very helpful; I just need to continue to practice more than anything.

I have never been too good at school, so it is a bit harder for me to understand different magical theories and ideologies.

That is why it is so important for me to spend each day going over each section. I need to train hard to be able to meet my goal.

I have never really thought about once I get my memories back, what will change. If I know my past, how will I see myself now? How will I see the world? The scariest thought of all, how will I see the man who owns me?