Our First Sunset (A Novelette)

Prologue

I always believe that in life, everything takes time. We don't need to rush things because there's always a perfect timeline and opportunity that will surely come. I grew up and learned that it is important to put calculations and considerations with every choices and actions I'll make. I'm also living a life full of security, assurance and a higher chance that I'll definitely get the things I've wanted.

But there was a moment in my life which made me questioned my intuitions and gut with a certain thing. So here I am, kneeling in front of God while praying for a hundred percent chance that I'll pass the upcoming final examinations so I could be the Cum Laude I've been wishing for since day one. And with that, I could make my family proud and prove them wrong.

Aaminin ko, hindi ako madalas na humingi ng awa at gabay sa Kanya. Pero ngayon, wala na akong ibang mapuntahan. Hindi ko rin alam kung sino pa ang mapagsasabihan ko ng sama ng loob. Sarili kong pamilya, hindi magawang basahin ang nararamdaman ko. It's because they used to see me as a strong girl who could get through everything. They never thought that sometimes I feel weak and hopeless.

Pero darating pala sa punto na...mawawalan ka rin ng lakas at mabubuo ang takot sa sistema mo. Hindi ko rin alam kung anong pumasok sa isip ko at napunta ako sa lugar na 'to. Dapat ay nasa review center ako o nasa aking kwarto para mag-aral nang husto.

I don't want to disappoint my family. I'll always stand with my decision so I need to prove myself more. I need to make them believe that I didn't waste a single time, that I made the right choice. Hopefully, I can make them proud after my upcoming graduation.

Ilang minuto lang akong nagtagal sa loob ng simbahan. Nagpasya na rin akong lumabas nang maramdaman ang pag-vibrate ng aking cellphone. Lalong sumama ang loob ko nang mabasa ang caller ID. Walang buhay kong sinagot ang tawag.

"Dione! What's wrong with you? I've been calling a couple of times!"

I almost threw my phone away because of hid loud voice. He is Maze, my boyfriend for two years. I never thought that I've got my first boyfriend during college. Hindi ko inakala na kaya kong isabay 'yon sa pag-aaral ko. But Maze was persistent back then, he did everything to win my heart.

Dahil sa kagustuhan kong maranasan ang sinasabi nilang "feeling" ng in love, sinagot ko siya. So here we are, two years of being together.

"Maze, I was inside the church. Tone down your voice." I said in a monotone, trying to control my temper.

"Really? Mabuti naman at kahit sa bagay na 'yan eh may time ka! How about me, Dione? Kailan ka magbibigay ng oras sa akin?" Bahagya kong inilayo ang cellphone sa aking tainga dahil sa pagsigaw niya.

Hindi ko rin mapigilang mapalingon sa paligid dahil baka nakakaagaw na kami ng atensiyon. Naglakad na rin ako papalayo sa harap ng simbahan para pumunta sa side na wala gaanong tao.

"You know I'm busy with my studies. Ano bang mahirap maintindihan doon?" I said while having a creased forehead.

He sighed heavily from the other line.

"Busy? I know! Pero ilang linggo na tayong hindi nagkikita! Boyfriend mo ba talaga ako, ha?"

Napairap na lang ako sa kinatatayuan. Ang tagal na namin sa relasyon pero ganito pa rin ang behavior niya. He should grow up at least! Lagi na lang siyang nagiging dramatic kapag nagtatalo kami nang ganito.

"Calm down, Maze. Don't be too irrational. You know that I'm doing this for myself--"

"Oo na! Sarili mo na naman! Kailan mo ba sinabi na 'yong mga bagay na ginagawa mo ay para sa ating dalawa, ha? Dione...I'm having a hard time! Ang hirap mong...ang hirap mong intindihin.."