Matt & Allen ✓

Chapter 1

a/n: Okay, so if I'm completely honest this book might just be a giant excuse to listen to 60-90s music and force everyone reading this to listen to it too. The Beatles are great, they made some good songs. I know everyone knows them and they're not super 'underground' or anything, but I like them. So anyway, here's the story, I hope you like it, and comment if you want, I really appreciate the feedback I get from you guys. 

It was a pretty normal day in December when Matt was stood behind the book checkout counter at the library like he always did. He worked there Monday through Thursday after school and sometimes on weekends. He was sitting, quietly reading from a collection of Hemmingway's short stories. Hardly anyone was coming in and out, and he only really looked up when someone needed him, so he had a lot of time to just stand around and read. 

"Excuse me, I have a question-" Matthew looked up, his eyes landing on a boy about his age with dark hair and clear blue eyes. He stood up a bit straighter, dog-earring his page as he closed his book, running his fingers through his fluffy brown hair. 

"Y-yeah, how can I help?" He asked with a little smile and the taller boy smiled a bit back, perhaps finding the slight awkwardness in his demeanor funny. It wasn't the first time Matt had been picked on or made fun of for being a bit too short and a tad too clumsy. 

"I'm looking for a book on poetry, do you have any?" He asked and Matt nodded, moving over to the clunky white computer sitting on the counter next to him to look for where it might be located, clicking through the sections. 

"Yeah, it's um...I'll just show you, follow me." He said and the taller boy nodded a bit as Matt walked around the counter and glanced through the different aisles until he found the classics section toward the back. "Are you looking for anyone in specific?"

"I don't think so, it's just for an English essay." He said, scratching the back of his neck and Matt thought for a moment before pulling a large book out of the shelf followed by a few smaller ones. 

"So there's a book of general poetry and the workings of it, then Dickinson, Tennyson, and Frost, that should give you a good foot in the door for poetry. You don't have to read the whole thing, just get an idea for it." He said and the taller took the stack with a small smile. 

"I guess you know a lot about books and stuff then, huh?" He asked and Matt nodded a little, not sure what he was getting at. 

"Yeah, my dad's really into classics and kinda introduced me to 'em. He says it's good to remember the past and all that." He said with a small smile, walking towards the checkout counter again and the other boy strolled along after him. 

"That's cool. My dad's into old music, Jimi Hendrix and The Doors and all that, and the record player's like twenty years old but he won't get rid of it. He did get me into Queen though so I guess I gotta thank him for that." He chuckled and Matt smiled. 

"I know they broke up like twenty years ago, but I still really like The Beatles, and my friend Liz got me into Greenday," He said, walking behind the counter and checking out the taller boy's books. "Oh, do you have a library card?" Matt asked and he nodded, opening his wallet to pull it out and Matt looked it over a moment before typing the numbers into the computer, pushing his glasses up. Allen Pierce. He smiled a little to himself and handed it back. "They're due back in two weeks."

"Can I come back before then?" Allen asked and Matthew shrugged with a small smile. 

"If you want." He said, trying to ignore the rising heat he felt in his cheeks. It didn't mean anything, he was sure Allen wasn't like him. 

"Well, what if I just wanted to hang out with you?" Allen asked and Matt smiled. 

"Why would you do that?" 

"Because you seem cool, I want to get to know you better. There something wrong with that?" He asked and Matt shook his head. 

"No, it'd be fun to go somewhere sometime and hang out." 

"Well good. Do you have a phone number?" He asked and Matt nodded, taking a small piece of paper out from under the counter to write down his number, folding it up, and handing it to Allen. "Do you have a name to go with that?" He asked and Matt realized he hadn't actually told him his name. He laughed softly and nodded. 

"It's Matthew, but my friends call me Matt." 

"Am I a friend?" Allen asked with a cocked eyebrow and Matt nodded. "Well good, don't be a stranger then." 

"I'll see you around," Matthew said and Allen gave him a little two-finger salute and smirk before heading out the door. Matt sighed softly and stood there staring at the door for a few minutes, wishing Allen would come back inside so they could keep talking, but he looked back to his book, biting his lip. He knew he shouldn't be thinking about him like that, they'd only just met and Allen most certainly wouldn't see him like that, and he couldn't possibly tell him. No, he'd just let it die away like all the other times he'd had a fleeting thought about liking a boy. 

He'd felt that way for quite some time, but it wasn't like he could talk about it. He couldn't tell anyone, not his parents, not his friends, he could hardly tell himself, so he just buried it and hoped it'd go away. It wasn't easy, but it was what had to be done. 

Over the next few weeks, Allen came in a lot, not every day, but every few days he seemed to find an excuse to come see Matt again. He'd asked about books or music or something completely random that 'only a librarian would know' and Matt would come up with some ridiculous answer before leading the conversation back to asking how Allen's day had been. 

"You know, I've been meaning to see that new movie, Titanic, it's in the cinema right now and I can't get any of my friends to see it with me, but I know you like history and nerdy stuff like that, so I thought I might ask you. Do you want to go?" Allen asked and Matt smiled, his breath caught in his throat, before nodding quickly. 

"Yeah, that sounds like fun, when do you have time to go?"

"This Saturday?" Allen suggested and Matt nodded again. 

"Sure!" 

That was the beginning of everything. They went to that movie and not long after they started hanging out every weekend, or whenever they had time really. They hung out at each other's houses, went to the arcade whenever there were a few quarters to spare, and for some reason, Matthew's feelings never died down. He thought that when he'd convinced himself that Allen was just a friend, he'd start finally seeing him that way, but he never did. Matthew had had friends before, he had plenty of guys who he hung out with and the problem of liking them never came up, but Allen was just different for some reason. He could never get rid of that awful feeling inside that there was something more there, that he wanted more to be there.