Shut Up And Write - Assignment Book

Round Three

I nod, my smile growing. She doesn't realize how accurate her statement is. "Thank you."

I sit directly across from the man. His gaze has a burning intensity that is only exemplified by his silence. I keep my focus on the sweet one.

"My name is Avise Renshaw." She grabs a large spoon and scoops the contents of a deep pot into a wooden bowl. She hands the bowl to me and gestures with her head to the man. "And this is Mister Dev."

I nod at them both. "I'm Mateo."

I have a conflict of instincts as I grab the spoon and look down at the food before me. It looks like a hearty stew with chunks of meat, potatoes, carrots, and lots of barley. My mouth is already salivating just at the looks of it. The primal man in me wants to rip into this food ravenously. It may be that I never get a meal like this again. However, there is a small sliver in me that holds back. The main reason I have survived this long in my life is due to the kindness of others. I may not know much, but I do know that it is polite to engage in meaningful conversation with a gracious host.

Rather than stuff my face, I look around the cottage. "This is a lovely home, Avise. Did you build this yourself?" Now that I have directed the conversation in her direction, I allow the spoon to enter my mouth. The amazing combination of spices, both savory and sweet, is so decadent on my tongue, I almost don't hear her answer over the imaginary angels.

"Oh, you're too kind. No, Mister Dev and I moved out here after my husband died. I wanted to appreciate the rest of my life in peace." She takes a small sip of the broth. "What were you doing out there all by yourself? Where are your parents?"

This isn't the first time I've been mistaken as an age younger than my own. I have soft features and unblemished skin. Particularly when I shave I look like I'm in my mid-teens. Tephin was the one that first suggested I start shaving. He said that using my "boyish charm", I will come across as more innocent and cause others to let their guard down, especially parents. It's funny to think that Tephin is the closest thing I've ever had to a father and he's teaching me how to con people.

I shake my head as I smile at the fond memory. "I don't have parents." I open my eyes wide in shock. Did I really just say that? I look back to Avise and see her face is completely filled with pity. I internally sigh. I try to keep my tone tender, despite my annoyance. "But I'm okay. I'm 21. I've done this before. You don't need to worry."

I am not weak. If anything, I am stronger because I didn't have parents to dote on me my whole life. I look down at my stew, trying to keep my face from showing my anger. Then, I realize something. Since the information is already out there...I may as well use it to my advantage.

I look back up at her and give a smile that hopefully comes across as tired and brave. "I am grateful, Avise. It is the kind heart of people like you that help children grow into men like me." I grab my spoon and scoop another helping of the amazing dish. "I hope it's not too forward to ask. There's a thunderstorm coming. Do you mind if I stay here? At least until it passes?"

Avise opens her mouth as if to answer, but her voice is drowned out by the gravelly response of Mister Dev. "You may stay on one condition."

I nod. It's only fair that I earn my keep.

He folds his arms across his chest. "Make me laugh."

I am jolted, spoon halfway to my mouth. What an odd request.

I did not grow up in a setting where humor was common. The fear of death, the loss of hope, or the anger of unfairness tended to be the expressions of emotion to which I have grown accustomed. This isn't to say I am completely unaware of the concept. My brother Orran and I have been fortunate enough to survive as long as we have thanks to what some call "schmoozing". Being charming, charismatic, and light-hearted can give you an advantage in social settings. Laughter can be more intoxicating than alcohol, leading powerful men to make unwitting mistakes. In those settings, however, I've had weeks to study my subject and learn what he cares about, what he considers his strengths, and what weaknesses he hides or flaunts.

This situation is different. This man has been quiet all evening. I know nothing of his profession, his interests, or his opinions. I have no indication of his personality other than his ever-present scowl. I suppose I could use even that little bit of information to my advantage. He's a gentleman that is reserved, carries consistent anger upon his shoulders, and demands humor in exchange for a room. Therefore, I am going to assume that he is a man of straightforward simplicity. I think I'll go with a quick, vague story with a humorously dark punchline.

I set down my spoon and look Mister Dev right in the eyes with a nod and a large grin. I hope this works.

"I was sitting at home the other day, working my way through the third brown ale, when my brother walks in. 'You're a mess,' he says. 'Just look at you. You've probably gained 50 pounds since I last saw you.'" I slap my stomach with both of my palms. "'I actually don't mind having a beer belly,' I tell him. 'I've always wanted a father figure.'"

And now I wait.