Petal [h.s.]

Chapter 4

"I don't know." Ian's leg twitched unstoppably as he leaned forward and rested his elbows on his knees, rubbing his face, "I don't fucking know."

"It's okay. We have a lot of time to figure stuff out, that's why you're here. The months you spend here will be used to put all your affairs in order, so everything is planned out when you get out."

He sighed and looked in my eyes again. "They're also... more like distributors. They don't just use." He mumbled. I tried to seem surprised as if I didn't already know this information about Louis. "You mean they're dealers, those friends?"

"Yes and no. They're... suppliers is maybe a better word. They don't deal themselves, they control all the dealing." He was speaking carefully, as if unsure if this information was legal or not and if I could use it against him.

"And you were involved in that?" My eyes widened slightly when I thought about this 17 year old boy being involved in the gang life, or the life in general that I had witnessed last night at the bar. The nudity, the obscenity, the drug use. 

He nodded shortly. "One of them... He owns a bar downtown. That's where a lot of the smaller business happens during the day. He has like... an office there and stuff. I was never allowed in any of the meetings, but I did help with like shipments and all. There's this huge mansion where the real shit goes down, but I was never allowed anywhere near it. I'm like... lowest rank."

"That's... Is there criminal activity we need to be aware of?" I tried to not sound like I was judging, knowing very well he was talking about Harry's bar. 

Ian looked uneasy and I could tell I was starting to scare him off. It's the last thing I wanted to do since he had enough on his mind as it was. He had never been convicted and wasn't in any contact with juvenile judges, at least not that we knew of. 

"Thank you for being so open." I added, trying to get back to a lighter place.

He nodded shortly again and let out a shaky sigh. "I'm going crazy here, I feel like I can't take my mind of drugs." He rubbed his legs with his hands, trying to snap out of it.

"Well... Is there anything you want to ask me? Maybe we could change the subject?" I smiled warmly, all part of trying to connect with him. Trust couldn't be formed when only one person knew everything about the other. It was honestly the hardest part about this job. 

I wanted to get close to them, but we couldn't become friends. I had to be personal, but not so personal that they could use things against me. The distance-proximity thing they taught me in school was faltering before my eyes as I felt incredibly sorry for this boy.

"How old are you?" Ian asked.

"24, turning 25 this year."

"You look younger." He remarked and I internally cringed. I know people always assumed I was 18 or something. It helped to bond with the kids as they thought of me more like someone their age, but I didn't like it either way. 

"And... did you like, go to university and shit?"

I shook my head no. "I went to college for three years so I do have a degree in social assistance, but no uni."

He seemed impressed by that. "That's cool, dude. I always thought I wanted to go to college."

"You still could, you know. Is there something you think you'd be good at?"

He looked at me warily and shook his head slowly. "I don't know... I don't think I can do many things. It's why I followed Louis into the whole drug thing. It seemed easy enough."

I nodded and glanced at the clock. "Well, I see it's time for lunch in a few minutes so I think we should head back down." Ian nodded and followed me down the stairs.