"Murderer!"
"Terrible!"
"Unworthy!"
"Psychopath!"
"You don't deserve them!"
These words scream in my head. A never ending cycle. after all these years of them screaming in my head. I came to learn something.
They're right.
Every single word.
Most of all, I don't deserve Matthew or Jasper Lance. I never have and never will. They deserve someone right in the head. Not a psychopath.
My lungs stops taking in air. My lungs hurts but I don't care, I don't panic. The voices get louder as my lungs stop working.
Then I do something I never thought I'll do. I let go.
Black dots surrounds my vision, as the door to the bedroom is thrusted open. Turning my head, I see the panic look on Matthew's face.
I smile at him as the burning in my lungs start. With the panic look still on his face, he runs over to me.
Holding my nose, he presses his lips to mine and pushes air in my lungs. As air fills them, the burning stops.
I take deep breathes of air, filling my lungs to the brim. When I'm breathing right again, I turn my face to a crying Matthew.
I look at him, tears in my eyes. "I don't deserve you or Jasper Lance."
He looks at me with pain and determination. Picking me up bribal style, I'm carried down to the medical ward.
The doctor checks me. When she's done, she looks at me with sadness. "Luna had a panic attack. That is what stopped his breathing."
"Thank you doctor." Then Matthew picks me up and carries me back to our bedroom.
Setting me on the bed, he goes to the closet, pulling out his leather box, setting up.
"Undress!" he orders of me in a scary voice.
Trembling, I take off my clothes until I'm completely naked.
"Stay standing!" I remain standing on trembling legs. My knees hitting together. I look down at myself. My stomach has flap. My six pack gone.
"Disgusting." I whisper to myself. "How is he still attracted to me."
I hear something drop, before I'm taking in Matthew's arms. He picks me up, caring me to the mirror in our room.
He sets me on my feet. Standing behind me. He puts his hands on my stomach. I want to remove his hands.
"You see this?" He ask as he kisses my neck.
"This is were our baby grew." His hands rub my stomach.
"This makes you even more beautiful." His hand moves to my sides.
"Being conpletely honest, you're even more sexy since having our son." His eyes connects with mine through the mirror.
Turning me around, he wraps his arms around my naked body. His hands moves down my side to my hip. Taking my hips in his hands. He wraps my legs around him.
I moan as my dick fictions against his stomach. Matthew takes my lips with his, carrying me to the bed. He lays me down.
I watch as he steps back and grabs Spreader Bars. It's leather with a metal bar that attaches the leather straps together.
Smirking, he puts the straps on my thighs. My legs are spread apart. Flipping me gently on my back.
He looks at me with black eyes. Anger and love in them. I don't know what the anger is but it kind of scares me. He's never been angry with me.
