One Chance

7. Far Away

"I cannot send you away with my own hands." He took a moment to pause to read her expressions. "Do not go. Stay with me!" These words were enough to stop Halime. He said those with such purety and it sounded like an order which Halime with due respect and love wanted to obey but someone else held stronger orders above them.

Halime gave him a look for a second. A look of no hope.

"Be the Sultan of my heart, mother of my children and my companion till the end." He came to a stop with this. Only if you would have said this last night Ertugrul. Is what Halime wanted to reply with.

Halime looked at Ertugrul again, he was quite confident. His love for her made him confident, he believed on his love for her is the only way to stop her, though he knew that it won't work. Halime took a deep breath and looked at their hands now. Her eyes were carrying guilt and it didn't went unnoticed by Ertugrul.

The guilt of separating from a man who loves her to the most but this isn't her mistake too. Sometimes it's fate that test them and sometimes it's people around them and in this case it was both. Both fate and people were ready to test them but it's the love that was going to help them in every test. All it needed was time and patience. Ertugrul had time but not the patience and Halime..... she had patience but not the time. That's how the fate was! For both of them.

"You are a valiant, honest and brave man with a good heart, Ertugrul Bey." First time she ever called him that. Pure anger. Though her tone was calm like he wanted him to listen to her and understand.

Halime took a pause for a little then continued. "But my fate was sealed a long time ago. This can't happen now. I wish we could've met in a better situation." A pause. "I ran away because I knew the conditions would never be in our favor, I wanted to protect both of us from this.... from our feelings."

She took another pause which clearly told how difficult it was for her to say those words having something else in her heart but she continued and the words that Ertugrul least wanted to hear at the moment came out of her mouth but he couldn't argue cause it was true. She said, "this could've went a better way only if you would've...."

Ertugrul silently smiled about how helpless he was in the situation. Halime's words were true, her feelings too were so were his words and feelings, instead of the time everything was so right.

As Ertugrul's pleading eyes locked with hers, she decided to say few nice words and consider it a goodbye from her side so that she could cry in peace later.

"You are hope of these lands and the people who live on these lands Ertugrul Bey. You are the bey of your tribe. Halime........ Halime Sultan don't deserve you. You deserve someone thousand times better than me, a Hatun who can give you beautiful children and a trouble less life, who's existence in your tent soothes other people. I'm sorry, I can't give you anything."

She was so angry. At the fate. At their parents. At him. At herself. Only if she could remove the past some moments where Ertugrul half confessed how badly he wanted her in his life so that she could actually feel better that the confession never happened. The worst part she found in this thing was that only if he would've not confessed she could've gave him all the blame but she loved him too and understood him and knew that it wasn't his mistake too.

Ertugrul took a step closer towards Halime. He was also angry but maybe not more than Halime.

"You don't know that I don't need anything or anyone if I have you. I just want you! I need your support, I want you to become my Hatun. I will..."

She didn't needed more words or promises when they were actually going to mean nothing because she was going and he could do nothing about it.

"Ertugrul Bey!" She said that again. "I respect you alot, you saved me, you accepted me actually bear me in your tribe and I'm very thankful about it but nothing is in my hands, I'm helpless, I'm fed up, I will cry, my heart will break into pieces but they will never let us come together, they will continue to chase us, harm us, kill us. My existence will push your tribe towards danger and I can't let that happen. Ayubi, Selcuks, Crusaders and not to forget Kayis, they'll won't let this happen. You will not say anything but you too will get tired of it, of dangers on your head because of me, of not being able to face your family because of me. So it will be better if we will just go from where we came."

"Don't say that." He begged in a whisper. "You give me strength Halime. I can face my family, your family, Crusaders, Ayubi everyone if you are standing with me. I'll protect you."

"I don't need protection Ertugrul, you'll need it more if I'll join you at this path and I can't do this to you. Your existence means alot to your tribe, to future of Turks, to your family. I can't do this."

A tear that was threatening to leave Ertugrul's eyes finally left. He was crying for them, for failing so miserably, for not being strong at the right moment.

"I will be thankful to you if you pray for an easy death for me."

Just as the words left her mouth, she felt the loss of touch of warmth on her hands. She said that with a smile but forgot to hide the hurt in her eyes. He just looked at her, startled by the last words that came out of her mouths.

"Ertugrul Bey..... When a person knows that they can't unite with their earthy love, they wish to unite with their divine love."

"I wish you find happiness that I know I would never get. May you have a great life Ertugrul which I know I'm never going to get. you will always remain in my prayers."

More steps but then what stopped Halime once again were Ertugrul's words. The ones who still held hope.

"What if...." She looked at him as he stopped for a pause, then he looked at her. "What if fate brought us together again? Sooner or later, what if fate, conditions, our hearts and our love gave us another chance. Just one chance."

She smiled, the saddest smile Ertugrul had ever seen. Sad because as she looked at him she saw him still carrying hopes which she appreciated cause that proved that he wasn't the one to let go so easily.

"If that happened..... if we reunited in this world again, if both of us won't be married at that time then nothing can separate us Ertugrul. But I don't want you to wait for me just because of an ounce of hope you hold deep in your heart. I too do." Another weak smile came, Halime turned her back towards him.

"Do not go!" That's only words that came out of Ertugrul's mouth but Halime was determined, she shook her head and whispered "I have to." She left Ertugrul. She stepped away.

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Just to let you guys know that you are the best and may Allah bless you all and your families with happiness and health. Ameen. :)