SAVE ME || KTH

2

Y/n and I sat for hours talking about life and our career paths. It was nice to talk to someone who actually cared about the things I cared about. Someone that cared in general actually. With Nari, conversations were hard, insanely hard. All she cared about was the things she liked. She never took interest in the things that made me happy. Every time I tried to talk about myself or something that made me happy she always changed the topic and or said she was bored. So with y/n actually caring and listening to me, it made me happy.

"I know you may not want to talk about this, but how are you? I know things with Nari suck but I just want to make sure you're okay." Y/n says, a sad look on her face. I look up, my eyes meeting hers. I let out a shaky breath and speak. "It hurts, I'm not okay." I say, the words not wanting to come out. Y/n's eyes soften as she frowns. "Come here." She says, holding her arms open. I move forward, nearly collapsing into them.

"It's okay. I'm here for you no matter what. I just want you to know that. I'm so sorry you have to go through this, you don't deserve it at all." Y/n says, her voice sad as she squeezes me tightly. I never wanted her to let go. I needed this hug. In that moment I felt okay, I felt all the pain and sadness lift off my shoulders.

"I just don't understand. Why me? What did I do to deserve this?" I ask, my voice cracking slightly. "It's not your fault that she's awful. She's miserable with herself so she takes it out on you. You don't deserve that. You're awesome and if she doesn't see that then she doesn't deserve you." Y/n says and I feel myself wanting to cry.

"I get why you don't leave. You feel stuck and you don't wanna be alone but I promise you'll feel so much better to get that negativity out of your life." Y/n says and I know she's right but that's easier said then done. If It was that easy I'd have left a long time ago but it's too hard.

"Can we not talk about this anymore, I'm tired." I say and y/n gives me a small sad smile before nodding her head, her h/c hair falling into her face slightly. "What do you want to do then?" She asks, her eyes patient as she waits for my answer. I lean my head back towards the ceiling, letting my eyes fall shut. I wondered what Nari was doing. She hadn't texted and she told me not to bother her so all I could do was hope she wasn't cheating on me again.

"I should actually get going. Busy day tomorrow." I say and y/n nods and stands. "I'll walk you to the door." She says and I nod and stand too. As much as I would have loved to stay here for a few more hours, I knew if Nari got home before me I'd never hear the end of it.

"I'll text you tomorrow and remind, Keep your head up and don't let that she devil ruin your mood, okay?" Y/n says as she cracks a smile. I nod, forcing a smile onto my face as well. "Thank you...for everything." I say in which y/n replies, "Of course, anytime!"

-

When I get home I throw my keys aside and lay down on the bed. Nari wasn't here yet and the many thoughts of where she could be clouded my mind, making me want to throw up. She could be anywhere with anyone and I have no idea. I let out a sigh as I stared up at the blank ceiling.

Oh the many nights I stared off into space wishing things were different, wishing Nari was different. As much as I hated that thought it crossed my mind quite often. Was it selfish to wish she would change? To not be how she is?

It wasn't always like this though. In the beginning we were great. Happy and never fighting. Everything was perfect but of course that didn't last long. In fact, it stopped being great after a month or two. That's when things started to change. She started showing her true colors. She showed me the real her. As the days turned to months and the months turned into a year, I started to realize just who she truly was, and I hated it.

Yet I love her and I keep holding onto this hope that she'll change but she never does. Nothing ever changes, ever. It's just one big never ending cycle of pain. I want that pain to stop and as long as I'm with Nari,

it never will...

-

A loud crashing noise jolted me awake, nearly giving me a heart attack. I looked over at the clock to read 4:40am. One feeling took over me; pissed. I was pissed. "Hey baby!" Nari slurred as she stumbled into the bedroom, nearly blinding me as she flipped the lights on. "Are you seriously drunk right now?" I ask, my emotions getting the better of me. "No, not at all! I'm okay." She declares as she slurs her words and continues to stumble around the room.

"Who were you with?" I ask, watching her fall back into the bed. "Just friends, okay." She says, her words a bit defensive as if she didn't want to answer me but made herself. "What friends? Who?" I push. "Don't worry about it." She snaps back and that angers me. "Nari, who were you with?" I ask again, taking in her apperance. Her makeup was smeared everywhere, her hair was a complete mess, and overall she just looked wrecked.

"Just mind your business, fuck! This is why I hate being around you." Nari says, her voice full of hate. I felt my heart sink a bit. I had to push myself to say what I said next.

"Then leave."