Scarred

Chapter 2

I make my way over to the alpha's house, I’ve been here before of course, when I was younger, but a lot has changed since then. As I walk up the garden path I see that the gardens are still as perfect and exotic and wonderful as I remembered as a child. I used to love to run through these gardens with Sakura when her parents came to visit the alpha pair. I spot a patch of daffodils, I love how they feel, soft like velvet but they stand so strong, I take a second to smell one, I know I can get into trouble for not going straight to the house, but I have a feeling that I will need something good and pure to get me through this day. I stroke the petals of a pale yellow one, then bend down and inhale deeply, it feels like I am breathing sunshine into my heart. I stand up fast, having heard something behind me, but when I look there is nothing there, I am not risking taking any more time to inspect further. I run a few steps towards the house, then slow down and walk at my usual pace, I attempt to slow down my breathing, I will not get into a panic over this. I will not give him the satisfaction of seeing me afraid. I reach the house and knock on the door. 

I am greeted by another maid, though not one I have seen before. "Good morning, I am Lucy, I was sent for by alpha Declan" her eyes widened, and then looked down to my neck, I know she was looking at the scar, everyone looks, then she brings her eyes back up to mine. I don't know what is going through her head, but she looks concerned. She coughs, and composes herself wiping away invisible creases in her clothes, when she looks at me again, she is smiling.

" I'm sorry, Lucy did you say? Pleased to meet you, I'm Bernie, you are here to assist me in my duties for today, follow me child."

I followed her into the house. She called me child, maybe she didn't know the rules about me. I would have to try warn her. "My usual assistant has fallen ill, let’s go down to the kitchen and I will explain what we will be doing for the day"

I say nothing, I want her to stop talking to me, if the alpha hears her she will be punished, I will warn her in the kitchen. " I hope you are better than the last girl they sent me, she was hopeless, she was all fingers and thumbs that one. She fell over the mop, twice!" Bernie starts chuckling, smiling and winking at me. When I don't smile back at her she stops walking and looks at me puzzled. I smile back at her

" I assure you I am capable of any duties you would have me do madam" she looks at me, hard, like she is trying to figure me out, then she smiles and starts walking again, she looks over her shoulder and says

" I'm sure you will do fine child, no need to be nervous eh?" I smile at her and we walk in silence until we reach the kitchen. 

The kitchen is huge, there is a wooden work surface in the middle of the room, it’s at least three times longer than my bed and twice as wide, there are bowls of fruit and plates with freshly baked bread on them by the smell, I had forgotten what freshly baked bread smells like, all of a sudden my stomach rumbles, loud. Bernie turns to me, she looks me up and down

"when is the last time you ate?" She asks

" I ate this morning madam"

" you can cut it out with that madam business, I told you my name is Bernie, now sit down at that table at the back of the room, over there" she points to the back of the room "I'll bring us a pot of tea" I look to where she told me to sit, there is a small table with five wooden chairs around it, I walk over and take the seat nearest the wall. 

This is not what I was expecting at all. I had assumed that the alpha would answer the door, that he would have some horrible activity for me to do. He may still be planning something horrible, but for now the only person I have seen is Bernie. I wondered how I would tell her that she was not to speak to me. It feels so wrong, she seems like such a nice woman. She must know who I am, she knows my name and she has seen the scar, and yet she does not shun me. I will just have to say something like " it’s forbidden to talk to me, unless it’s work related" but that sounds so cold, and she has been kind to me. "You can be punished for talking to me" no, that sounds like a threat, ok she is coming over, I have to think of something to say to her now. 

"Do you take sugar child?" She sets a tray with a teapot, two cups, a milk jug and a bowl of sugar on the table.

"No, thank you mada..." I stop myself when she glares at me, "no, thank you, Bernie" she smiles at me.

"Now isn't that better Lucy" she sits down and pours tea into two cups, she hands me one.

"Thank you." I pour milk into my mug and take a sip, trying to prolong this precious moment of normality, drinking tea with someone. It seems such an everyday thing, but I have not socialized like this in years, and I’m about to tell Bernie that she cannot be nice to me, or share tea and a chit-chat with me. But I must tell her, I put my tea down and I open my mouth to speak to her but she starts talking first

"I know what you are thinking, but you don't have to worry about me. I have been working for this family since I was about your age, and this is my home. This family is like my family" she looks at me and sadness fills her face "it's not right what happened, but it happened, and we need to move on" now she is looking at me like she’s holding back anger, uh oh, here it comes "yes, I know of the rules, I am not supposed to speak with you unless it’s work related, but while you are here, you work for me" her face softens again "and everyone knows I am a chatterbox" she winks at me "The alpha is not here today, but when you were requested I made it clear that while you work for me, I will be ignoring this one rule." 

She, she what? No "no, Bernie please, he will punish you, please. I don't want to be the cause of any harm or hardship to you. You have been kind to me, and your kindness means a great deal to me and I will hold it dear, but you must not break his rules." I blurt out, she has to know what he is like, he will hold it over her. She looks shocked, then concerned. She opens her mouth to speak, then closes it, I look down at my tea, was it really only a minute ago that drinking this tea was such a perfect moment? I take a deep breath and stand up from my chair. "What duties would you have me do?" She looks up at me.

"if it’s work related I may still speak to you?" I nod. She smiles, "In that case, could you please take these dishes to the basin and wash up?" I nod again, place the used dishes on the tray and carry it to the basin, I turn on the taps and add some soap and begin to wash up. It hurts that I had to stop the conversation. I know I have only met Bernie today but I truly like her company. But that is why I had to warn her. It’s the right thing to do. I finish washing the last cup and find a towel to dry the dishes. Once I have that done I turn to Bernie to ask where I should put the clean dishes. But she is not at the table, I turn and look around the rest of the kitchen. She is not in here. Uh oh, what do I do? I can't follow her, I only know the way to the front door. Did I upset her? Or annoy her? I don’t know what to do. I walk to the kitchen door and look up and down the hallway hoping she would just be out there waiting for me. No such luck. I walk back into the kitchen and decide to open all the cupboards until I find where I can put these dishes back. Luckily I find homes for all the dishes in a minute or two.

"That was quick" I turn to see Bernie looking at me, smiling. She has a feather duster in one hand and a polishing cloth in the other. I can't help it, I smile. She hasn't left me, and she doesn't look upset or annoyed. I feel relieved. "Right, I think we will start in the living room, you can polish the wood and I will dust the ornaments, follow me"

she smiles and starts walking out of the kitchen, I follow her, we walk through the same corridor we had come through to get to the kitchen. But this time I look around me, there are paintings on the walls. Some portraits and sceneries. The walls are a deep stained wood. The floors are a shiny stone, almost white in colour, like a very light pink. I imagine the floor is very cold. I used to love to walk barefoot on these kinds of cold smooth surfaces. 

We make our way back to the front door and walk past it, towards another door, Bernie opens the door and walks inside, I follow her and look around the room, there is a big fireplace in front of me, it’s beautiful, the wood is carved with images of trees running up the pillars, and beautiful wolves playing over the fire. There is a huge painting above the fireplace, it looks like the garden outside, but it’s, off somehow. I turn to the left to see a large bay window, it has a window seat. There are so many sofas and couches and loveseats in here, they all look so comfortable. Then I see all the wood I’ll have to polish. There are wooden tables, book shelves, corner units, a desk and the fireplace. I think I’ll save that for last though, I will enjoy polishing all the fine details in that.

" Shall we get to it then Lucy?" I nod at her, and she hands me the cloth and some polish from the pocket in the front of her apron.