𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐅𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐁𝐞𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐧 𝐔𝐬

♡︎14♡︎

I sighed and let it roll off my fingertips instead, landing on the floor with a thud. I didn't want to talk to Eijiro. I wanted to talk to Katsuki. I needed to apologize. That's why my bedroom light was still on, after all- a hope that he would see it. His room was dark, though. I sat up and planted my feet on the ground. Forcing myself to stand up, I walked to the light switch and flipped it off, then lay back down again.

The curtains on my bedroom window weren't drawn tightly closed, and a strip of light from the moon cut across my ceiling. It was as if the moon were trying to tell me to stop being stubborn. I stood again and marched down the stairs and outside. Then I sat there in the dirt by the fence. I should've texted him, but I couldn't. What if he ignored it? At least this way if he didn't come, I could tell myself it was because he was asleep.

I wasn't sure how much time passed as I sat there. Long enough for me to wonder why I was still sitting there. I stood and paced the fence. If he didn't come out by the time I counted to fifty, I'd go back inside and forget about this. I started my count. When I reached forty-nine, I decided that one hundred was a much better number. I needed to give him a chance, after all. Fifty seconds was barely more time than a center got to snap a football.

The numbers ticked through my head, one for each step I took along the fence line. "Seventy-six," I whispered aloud, my bare foot landing on a rock. "Ouch." I stopped and clenched my fists. This was ridiculous. Just as I turned to head back to the house, I heard his back door snick shut. I whirled to face the fence again and watched him walk slowly toward it. If he did know I was there, would he tell me how heartless I was for what I said the other night?

I was surprised when he walked right up to my board and leaned his forehead against it. "Hey," he said.

I leaned into the board as well. "Hi," I whispered. "I didn't think you could see me."

"You're wearing white dumbass. It practically glows through the cracks."

I looked down at my basketball camp T-shirt. "Oh."

"Are you still mad at me?" he asked.

"No. . ." I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. Relief flooded my body. I had missed him more than I realized. "I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"For what I said about your mom and dad. My family is far from perfect- you know that as well as anyone. I'm sorry for turning it around on you. I was just surprised." I shoved my hands into the pockets of my sweats. "Maybe my mom was different than I imagined her."

"Your family is pretty amazing, Y/N." I heard him draw in a deep breath. Maybe he was relieved we were talking again too. "I shouldn't have said that about your mom. I wasn't thinking. Here you were upset you couldn't remember anything about her and what do I do? Give you these depressing memories that aren't even yours. There were so many reasons she could've been sad. Maybe your brothers were fighting too much that day and she was at her wit's end. She had four kids in six years. That had to get overwhelming at times."

Unlike when we sat back-to-back against the fence, I could feel his breath seep through the crack and touch my cheeks. I still didn't open my eyes. We were so close that the air smelled like him. I didn't realize I knew how Katsuki smelled until that moment. "Thank you." I twisted, turning away from his scent, which was making my head spin. I put my back to the fence once again, then looked up at the night stars.

He didn't do the same thing, because his voice was crystal clear next to my ear. "My mom is a jerk and my dad should leave her."

"No. I shouldn't have said that. She's sick. If she would just stop drinking-"