I can't get rid this habit of mine:
Pushing people away
My classmates can't forget me. Why? Because I AM DIFFERENT ODD WEIRD
Sometimes my classmates always invite me to the cafeteria for lunch. I did take their offer... Sometimes but not always.
I hate cafeteria. Too crowded and noisy. I want to eat my lunch in a quiet and spacious place, is it hard to ask? I don't wanna explain myself to them again and again.
Sorry if you might find me cold and arrogant. (I'm just a human.)
I did have proper friends back in elementary level. Two girls, lets name them B1 and B2, we always take the bus together exchange bags and do childish stuff.
They didn't give up on me and I didn't push them away. They s t a y (omg imma cry 😢 lol) they are my first friends I made in school. I like it I wish I can go back to that moment and relived it. They are not my classmates maybe that's why? One day when we are playing sword using a stick MY INTROVERT SHELL WAS BROKEN 👀 😮.
Surprised? Lol I am too. It's the first time I laughed in school. Yeah first.
While I was playing with them in school, my classmate asked me "why are you chatty and friendly with them but not us?" I didn't give her a reply.
But if you ask why? My answer is: They treat me normal. They stay. They TRY to get to know me.
But in this time it's hard to find people who try since they are busy with their own lives. Sigh, maybe I haven't found the right group yet that will not get bored of me, that will stay with me even I push they away. (Lol hard to get?)
