Obscurity

Chapter 1 - Memories

The manor was as dark and damp as it had been when you left it the previous September. Almost a year ago. You had been so thrilled to get back to Hogwarts, back to your friends and most of all, back to Cedric that you'd forgotten about your inevitable return. The grand boardroom like dining table would be host to a number of rather unpleasant individuals in a matter of hours. You felt dread rising in your chest and the tightness of your muscles as the dark magic reminded you again of its presence.

"Children! You're here early, how wonderful." You hear a warm and maternal voice say. Narcissa. You breathed a sigh of relief a little too loudly and Draco looked at you annoyed. You shot a dirty look back at him but allowed him to greet his mother first before she came to you and gently held your face in her hands. "You poor girl, you are too young to have suffered such a loss." She said pitifully and you felt tears stinging your eyes once more.

Not again, you thought to yourself. Were you not cried out by now? You felt almost disgusted with your lack of resilience. A poor habit you developed after spending so much time with the Malfoys.You were tired and delirious from the lack of sleep, you had maybe managed an hour the previous night and weren't sure anymore how to distinguish what was grief and what was just plain hysterical.

Narcissa looked you over, first at your swollen puffy eyes, then your slept-in wrinkled robes and worst of all your hair that you neglected to brush since your bath the previous night. It had already managed to start matting after your restless night.

"How about you and I go unpack your things and get you cleaned up hm?" She said it so cautiously it was as if she thought you'd break if she spoke too loud. You looked over at Draco wearily and as he opened his mouth to speak you cut him off.

"I could really use that." You admitted turning to Narcissa and following her up the grand staircase to your room with Finn excitedly sniffing his new home the entire way. Leaving Draco alone to deal with his father.

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The grand white doors had to be at least twice your height, Narcissa rolled your suitcase behind you as you pushed them open and dim grey light overwhelmed your sensitive eyes. It was the only room in the house where the curtains were left open all the way. It was the only way you maintained your sanity in such a desolate place.

Everything was as you left it, your autographed snitch from the captain of the holyhead harpies perched proudly in the middle of your dresser. Your massive bookshelf had some gaps missing from what you'd brought with you to school this year. Over on the bay window you noticed a glimpse of yellow that made your heart leap. Cedrics old quidditch sweater. Narcissa sat on the chaise at the end of your bed as you hurriedly crossed the room and gripped his sweater in your hands and held it to your face. You desperately prayed it would still smell of him but you knew this particular sweater had not been worn by him in quite a long time. In fact it had likely been washed many times since. But you tried regardless, holding it to your face and desperately inhaling while the tears from earlier made their way to the surface and beaded off of the wooly yellow sweater.

You heard Narcissa rise from where she was seated on the chaise and make her way over to you. She placed a hand on each of your shoulders and stroked your hair comfortingly.

"Remember darling, we cannot control the things that happen to us, or in your case, our loved ones. But we decide how much we allow our pain to reduce us to. This too shall pass my dear." You looked at her with confusion and desperation in your eyes. You were so tired, you didn't want to have this conversation now. Her face looked like it could be made of stone she kept it so emotionless. She had her own role to play in all this. Silent, obedient wife of a death eater.