Runaway Groom (Groom Series Book 1) (English Translation)

Epilogue

I know. It was a very shallow excuse. But it was as plain and simple as that. Tommy was there. And Gulf was not.

During the times when we partied after the board meetings, I wanted to tell Gulf about them. It's just that, I didn't want to be insensitive. He was in Spain caring for his friend then I'll tell him I will be out partying? I did not want him to feel that I was enjoying my life without him.

I was inside my office reading and signing files when Tommy entered.

"Mew, let's party tonight. My cousin's bar is having it's grand opening. You should come with us."

"Pass. I have to stay home and behave." I turned my attention back to the papers I was reading.

"Don't be ridiculous. It will be fun. Besides, what are you going to do all night at your house? Stare at your ceiling and do nothing?"

"I really shouldn't." I refused again.

"You have no choice. We'll pick you up later so you don't have to drive. Be ready by seven."

Tommy insisted. So I could not do anything. I thought it would be a one-time thing. I didn't realize that we went to party after party.

The night I received my award, I simply mentioned Tommy to thank him because he convinced me to attend the awards show. When Gulf said that he couldn't make it for my birthday, I lost the will to go. But Tommy pushed me.

I was shocked when he kissed me. And with my great longing for Gulf, I thought it was him I was kissing. That is why I kissed him back.

What a petty excuse. I can't believe I tried to justify my wrong decision.

And when Gulf found out about everything, I was so ashamed of myself. I felt like I didn't deserve him. I felt like I was not good enough for him. I wasted the second chance that he gave me. I am such a terrible person.

How could I hurt for the second time the person I treasure the most in this world? You are beyond stupid, Mew!

I did not mean everything I said that night. After what I did, I knew I didn't deserve him. I felt unworthy of his love. And he did not deserve the love I could give him that time.

So I chose to drive him away. I knew he was having a hard time too. But I knew in my heart that I would only hurt him over and over again. I'd better just let him go first while I fix myself.

I slapped Gulf not because I wanted to hurt him. I just felt angry because I again felt like Hughie was his top priority. I thought that he also share the blame for why I cheated on him.

But I was wrong. It was all my fault. I am to be blamed for everything I did. Gulf was innocent. No one else should be blamed for my terrible actions and bad decisions.

What happened that night was very painful for me.

The next day, I found out that Hughie died. I felt guilty after everything I said to Gulf about him even if I did not mean a single word I said.

I felt sorry for Gulf. That night I broke his heart again, and his friend died without him by his side.

I knew I had to be there for Gulf. So even though I knew he didn't want to see me there, I went to the funeral anyway. And I was right. He did not want me there.

I saw how hurt he was by everything I did and everything I said. I could see the pain and disgust in his eyes. But grief for the bereaved friend to whom I spoke hurtful words prevailed.

I knew I would just continue to hurt Gulf. So I chose to let him go and gave him time and space.

I blamed myself so much. I was terrible. Not just as a lover, but as a person too.