"welcome to the lost hotline! where you can find old friends and make new ones!"
when a random app downloads on luli's phone and reunites her with old friends, what will happen?
published: february 9, 2021
final update: january 18, 2022
started: aro...
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the week went by quicker than luli thought. from jinsol and jaehyun's divorce, yeojin and yangyang almost fighting, johnten somehow nearly happening, and everything else, it had been a roller coaster of fun and chaos.
now it was over. school would start up again in a couple days, and it was time to head back to china.
the entire gang gang was at the airport, bidding their goodbyes. it was a bittersweet moment, with the boys dramatically hugging, the girls actually trying not to cry, and also everyone signing yeojin's cast.
"ningning, i said for you to sign the cast, not write a whole essay on it." yeojin said; her arm was getting tired.
ningning pouted and capped the marker. it was time for them to leave anyways. the groups said their last goodbyes and headed their separate ways.
"at least we'll always have the group chat." luli said. the rest of the group nodded and began to talk about the school and work ahead of them.
being separated from their korean and two japanese friends would be the least of their problems. they had no clue what was coming next.
𐄁𐄙𐄁𐄙𐄁𐄙𐄁𐄙𐄁𐄙𐄁𐄙𐄁𐄙𐄁
⚠️ TRIGGER WARNING ⚠️ : SUICIDAL THOUGHTS AND ATTEMPT
2 days later
vivi could barely live with herself anymore. every single thing she had done to help the lost group was eating her up inside, the guilt just piling and piling on.
she barely slept. the normal light in her eyes had dimmed. she'd lost weight, eating made her feel guilty. it all did. vivi felt guilty for even being alive.
she considered ending it all. every day. but a small voice in the back of her head told her to keep on going, to stay for everyone that has ever cared or loved her. for her parents, the loona girls, kun. and her siblings, even if they were dead, and all of this had been for nothing.
that voice had been getting smaller and smaller every day, until today. it just wasn't there anymore. it had been replaced with a louder voice, telling vivi to just end it.
getting up, getting ready for work, walking in to the building and clocking in had all been harder than ever. usually vivi could distract herself from the toxic cloud of thoughts in her brain, but not today. not as well, at least.
normally seeing his face all day used to feel like a blessing to vivi, now it felt like a curse. more guilt. she wished she could tell him everything and apologize a million times. she wished that she had never agreed to any of this. because despite the constant threats and warnings from the other members of the lost group to not fall, she did. she hated to admit it, because all she could do was hurt him and his best friends, but vivi had fallen for kun.
she hated the hours out of work. especially the one right after she finished, when everything came rushing back to her. like right now.
walking out of the building, vivi put her laptop away in her bag and hugged her arms around herself. it wasn't cold or anything, but she needed some sort of comfort.
"vivi!"
she froze and let her hands drop to her sides and her lips curl up into the usual small smile she was known for at work. turning around, a million different voices in her brain were yelling at her to talk to him, to keep on walking, to throw herself in front of that oddly familiar car that was passing by and parking.
where did i see that car? vivi thought to herself. then she realized when she felt her phone vibrate twice with text notifications.
fuck.
"vivi, hey! i wondering if you wanted to get dinner." kun asked, dimples on full display. vivi's heart did a small back flip.
she would have responded, but her phone dinging again interrupted her. vivi's heart dropped to her stomach.
MESSAGES
JADE
JADE get in loser we're going shopping
JADE kidding phin has a new plan and you don't own a car sooo..
JADE bitch if you don't wipe those heart eyes off your face i will smack them off myself
JADE pull your shit together
"sorry kun, not tonight," she said and held up her phone, "family. again."
vivi felt disappointed in herself for lying to kun right through her teeth. before she couldn't even look at someone at all if she lied to them.
the car honked, startling the two. vivi took a deep breath and looked back at kun.
"i'll um, text you later." she said, giving him a quick peck on the cheek. she walked off to the car, each step heavy with every ounce of guilt.
2 hours later
vivi unlocked the door to her apartment, feeling completely empty. the new plan was to kidnap someone and hold them for what she guessed you could call "ransom," which was really just luli's life. all of it felt wrong. it IS wrong.
the voice in vivi's head was getting louder and louder. it multiplied until it was all that was going through her brain.
just end it. end your shit. nobody would miss you. you're a horrible person.
vivi placed her head on her hands. "please get out of my head." she cried. she wanted the voices to be gone and out of her head.
the voice repeated it's chant in her head till it was practically controlling vivi. not even thinking, she ran to her bathroom and rummaged through the medicine cabinet. it didn't matter what type of pills they were, as long as they were strong enough. she grabbed the first one she saw. a bottle of kid's allergy pills.
still not pausing to think about what she was doing, she grabbed her phone, typing out and sending the two words that would thankfully save her life.
vivi grabbed the pill bottle, poured a few in her hand, and began to swallow.
