Obsidian & Bronze {Fred Weasley}

13. His and mine are the same

- Remus, your Moony

~~~~~

I held the parchment within my shaking hands, my nimble fingers struggling to keep a steady grip. Heavy and heated tears were now coursing down my flushed cheeks, violent streams of fuschia being left in their wake.

My head was robbed of all reasoned or consistent thoughts in that moment, as I drowned in the words spilling from the page. Each and every syllable was practically weighted with a raw sentiment, every word, strung together to make each sentence, was the most beautifully tragic series of words I had ever read.

I felt strangely guilty for a moment, as I noted that this, what I had initially intended to be mild, invasion of privacy, had led to me stumbling across a deep and dark piece of Remus, a piece I didn't suspect he wanted me to find.

I couldn't pinpoint the moment it changed, when everything switched, but somewhere over the past few minutes of me sitting there, with that broken parchment, scribbled with broken words, I seemed to be washed with a feeling I had never felt before, I think I missed Sirius Black?

I had been shown a new man, a man who was loved, a man who taught others how to love, a man who didn't want to leave and somehow was given no choice. I was shown somebody broken, someone who must've felt so lost and alone.

Maybe I knew Sirius better than I thought.

I couldn't initially decide which option was best. I didn't have many, but they all seemed to carry their own individual complications.

I could put the parchment back in the book, leave Remus's room, and erase the events of this morning, and carry on my life as though I had never stumbled upon the letter at all. But even I could acknowledge the illogical nature of that option, putting it back and walking away wouldn't take away from the fact I had read it, and nothing would change that now.

Secondly, I could talk to Remus, that seemed reasonable and rational. Although I had entered his room whilst it was locked, found a letter that clearly was not meant for the interest of others, and continued to read said letter even after I had acknowledged this fact. So perhaps Remus wasn't the best place to go.

And the last option was simply to take the letter with me, hoping that Remus would never notice, which was awfully optiomic, considering this seemed like something Remus read often, and maybe keeping the letter would give me more time to decide what do do with it and carrying it around with me would help me change my mind, maybe?

This last option, of course was the most irrational and unjustified one of all, but that evidently didn't stop me as I folded the letter up and slipped it into my pocket before making my way out the door undetected, leaving the room exactly as I found it, minus one letter.

I made my way back up the common room, noting the time and assuming everyone would be back from breakfast, and although my stomach churned, the lack of food not likely helping, how could I possibly care whilst a combination of perplexing emotions were overriding my senses.

"There she is," George announced cheerfully as I entered the common room, my cheeks likey flushed from the speed I had walked there in, combined with six pairs of eyes all now glued in my direction.

"Here she is" I repeated as I threw myself down onto the couch, conveniently the only open seat next to Fred, and whilst Geroge shot me a knowing look I simply narrowed my eyes in his direction, attempting to mask the sheer embarrassment from what he witnessed this morning.

"Where have you been all morning?" Ginny asked with a warm smile that I couldn't help but mirror.

"Library" I lied, and whilst I had in fact been to the library for all of ten minutes, I wasn't ready to indulge her question further.