Player: now I'm at the station to tell everyone the crazy news!
Announcer: there is a crazy person here; they're probably on crack but it's my day off so I don't care about doing anything to stop them.. go to the garage or something???
Player: just wonderful...
The player heads over to the garage
Player: Why is it locked? Fuck sake looks like I have to open it while a crackhead is trying to sell me weed. Just great.
The player heads down into the station.
Player: I never understood why we had this green radioactive stuff here, what's the point of it? What if an officer falls in? Wait a minute what the-
The player sees mother swimming in the radioactive waste
Player: is THAT the crackhead? Because somethings definitely up with them.
Mother noticed the player and started crawling out of the waste, and started to chase them.
Player: ohhh, they're probably the same as the other pig! Maybe they have like powers or something but they're villains? And I'm the main character so I'm the good guy, anyway miss do you know where your son is?
Mother: haha very funny -_- I'm not even meant to be talking so shut up before I launch into the waste and watch your body melt away.
Player: luckily I have this wooden board that I took from the house that helps me cross it! I knew that it would come in handy!
Mother: .....
The player crosses the waste and into the shower room
Player: Why is this room right by the radioactive waste?? This building is weird, why am I only noticing these now.
The player walks up the stairs and into the cell rooms
Player: why is there no prisoners? Somethings fishy here...
Announcer: you're just a shit police officer
Player: nah where did they actually go
Announcer: no clue I'm terrified. That's why I locked myself in the garage
Player: can you open it for me at least?
Announcer: if you get gas for the car
Player: fine... time to look for gas now.. where Tf is this going to be. Wait actually why don't I leave from where I came from? Why don't I just leave from the entrance? But nooo that doesn't make sense, WHAT?
Mother: I have now caught up to you
Player: Bro you guys are so slow.
Mother: we get better just give it like 17 more chapters
Player: wat.
Mother: Here comes the bat!
The player dodges. And whips out their pistol.
Player: I'm not afraid to use it!
Mother walks off in a hurry.
Player: dumbass, I don't even have any bullets left in it lmao.
The player looks around the cells for gas for what reason idk.
Player: there's a note in this one!
"I dropped the soap, I have been scarred for my life, someone help me outta here!"
Player: oh look there's another note!
"Someone dropped the soap, so I had to do what I had to do."
Player: this is just weird.. wait why is there gas in this cell, same one with that note in as well.
The player starts waking towards the garage until he finds another note
"I'll be relevant in book 2 trust me"
Player: book 2? Wait.. chapters, books.. maybe I am the main character, all right!
The player runs towards the garage.
Player: I have the gas open the door before the slow poke gets me
Doggy: ok
He opens the door
Doggy: put it in the car.
Player: what do you think I'm doing? Also it was you the whole time?
Doggy: how couldn't you tell it had purple text.
Player: oh silly me! How could I forget, stay let's get out of here.
Doggy: ok clown.
They get in the car
Player: har har har we are such best friends #bestfriendbanter I hope nothing bad ever happens to you doggy
They drive off
Doggy: You about to jinx me bro.
Player: ok. Anyway why isn't this a police car?
Doggy: because it's my day off? You're lucky I came here for you!
Player: and you're lucky I brought gas!
Doggy: well not much very clearly because we'll see what happens in the next chapter!
Player: yeah I'm definitely the main character.
Doggy: yeah yeah whatever. Anyway was that a crackhead?
Player: I honestly have no idea, I saw something similar at the house I was investigating at. I think they're monsters.
Doggy: Probably... how come they've just transformed into them though? They were normal people before!
Player: We'll talk more about this after chapter 3.
Doggy: ok.
YOU ARE READING
Piggy: Book 1 But it's terrible
RandomYou read the title, that's exactly what this is going to be, I'm sorry but also not sorry for making this.
