☔️Chrysanthemums☔️

Beginne am Anfang
                                    

"I-It hurts.. a l-lot.."

"I know, I know baby. It must hurt so much. But please, stay strong. Stay strong and survive."

"Eita.. I-I don't know i-if.. I c-can.. it h-hurts.."

"Please Kenjirou, I need you.."

"E-Eita, take t-this.."

He reached into his pocket and took out a red chrysanthemum. 

"I-I wanted to s-save this for a s-special moment.. I-I guess that's n-now.."

"Please.. Kenjirou don't go.."

I stuck the flower in his hair.

"I want to be with you longer.. I want to live a life with you.. wake up every morning with you next to me.."

"I w-want that too, Eita, I-I do. Trust me."

"Then please.. don't go.."

"I love you Eita.."

His eyes closed. 

And they didn't open again.


= = = =


"SemiSemi? SemiSemi hey!"

Tendou snapped his fingers in front of my face.

"H-huh? What?"

"You were going to tell us something, but then you spaced out."

"Oh."

I looked at the band in front of me. Tendou, Alisa, Suna, Yamaguchi, Futakuchi. 

"U-um, so you guys know Kenjirou.. you know.. last week..."

They all nodded sadly.

"So, um, I wanted to sing a song for him. So if you could leave the last one to me..."

"Of course, Eita-kun. Sing for your Kenjirou." Alisa pat my shoulder. 

"Yeah, we'll leave it to you. If you need us to back you up, we're here." Yamaguchi smiled. 

"Thanks guys.. I appreciate it."

They all nodded and picked up their instruments for dress rehearsal. 


= = = =


"Alright guys, so Semi here wanted to sing a song for you guys, so lets hand the mic off to him, shall we?"

The crowd cheered as Suna handed the microphone to me. I took a deep breath and started talking.

"Alright what's up?!"

Everyone in the crowd roared.

"Ok, so um, last week I lost someone really special and important to me."

There were some 'aww's in the crowd which only made me sadder.

"Yeah, I miss him. So I wanted to sing this song for him, hopefully somewhere up there, he's listening to this. Well, this is for you, Kenjirou."

As some people in the crowd made sad remarks and clapped slowly, I strummed the starting notes on my guitar.

"I'm headed straight for the floor, the alcohol served its tour. And it's headed straight for my skin, leaving me daft and dim"

I pictured Kenjirou, his bright smile that lit up the room. I missed him so much.

"I've got this shake in my legs, shaking the thoughts from my head. But who put these waves in the door? I crack and out I pour,"

Yamaguchi and Alisa strummed their guitars, giving me backup. 

"I'm mister Loverman.. and I miss my Loverman... I'm mister Loverman, oh, and I miss my lover!"

 I felt tears pricking the back of my eyes. I couldn't cry, not yet. 

"The ways in which you talk to me have me wishin' I were gone.. The ways that you say my name, have me runnin' on and on"

I sung with more emotion than ever in my life. It hurt so much. My heart was aching.

"Oh, I'm cramping up, I'm cramping up! But you're cracking up, you're cracking up"

"I'm mister Loverman, and I miss my lover, man.. I'm mister Loverman oh, and I miss my lover"

A tear fell out of my eye, falling down my face. Kenjirou, why can't you come back? I miss you..

"I'm shattered now, I'm spilling out upon this linoleum ground, I'm reeling in my brain again before it can get back to you"

More tears trickled down my cheeks. My breath began to get shaky. 

"O-oh what am I s'posed to do without y-you.."

Suna began to sing backup vocals. 

"I'm mister Loverman.."

Kenjirou...

"AND I MISS MY LOVER, MAN!"

Tears streamed down my face as I choked out strangled lyrics.

"I'm mister L-Loverman! Oh, a-and I miss m-my l-over!"

It hurt. I missed him so much. Every part of him. I wanted to hold him for eternity.

"I'm m-mister Loverman, a-and I miss my lover, m-an"

Kenjirou.. please come back..

"I'M MISTER LOVERMAN!"

But he can't.

"And I miss my lover..."

I crumpled to the ground, tears gushing down my face. I grabbed the mic, wiped my tears and forced out a smile. 

"Sorry guys I just... I miss you Kenjirou."

I see something land gently on the end of my guitar. 

I pick it up and smile, a very bittersweet smile. 

"I guess he was listening."

It was a petal from a red chrysanthemum.

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A/N:

a n g s t 

so that was your weekly fill of angst my parakeets, hoped you liked it

but seriously i can only think of angst for some reason-

anygays I LOVE YOU ALL SOOOOO MUCH 

-Rin💫

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