a new year with no new beginnings

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You take my hand in yours,

Your skin that is as delicate as a baby's

Your muscles that lost its firmness many years ago

You shake my hand that is barely larger than yours,

Wishing me a happy new year, wishing that I will be healthy

So I wish you back, the same way that I always did

And I expect you to let go, to tell me that you'll see me again


Only that this time, you didn't let go


This time, you looked at me, eyes weary from the near-eighty years on this earth

You looked at me like you'd never see me again

Like you were trying to memorise my face, in case you'd ever forget it

And I could do nothing but stay still

For I felt the slight tremble in the hand that held mine,

I saw the slight tremble that rippled across your now wrinkled-face

The small sniffling as your hand began to let go of mine

And I wish, I wish I knew what you were trying to say


We are generations,

dialects, 

sentiments apart


How do I tell you that I didn't even know your name?

How do I tell you that I don't have a recollection of time spent together?

How do I tell you that I'm glad I'm not the eldest son?

How do I tell you that I may not be sad, when you cross over to the other side?

How do I tell you all that, with my limited vocabulary?


Because I can't, I don't know how to, I don't want to

And this story that never really began doesn't have a conclusion

It's like the cliffhanger of a series you never really wanted to watch,

Yet you stick around to see what happens next

Does someone die? Does something happen that triggers a significant wave of character development? Does the series get cancelled?

Until then, i'll sit on my couch

Deliberating the possibilities day in day out,

Hoping that my prediction would be correct.



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