A Place To Escape

Chapter 11: Make Her Your Queen

A Place To Escape: Chapter 11 (Make Her Your Queen)

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The Supreme Leader of the First Order paces the length of his room for about ten minutes before wrenching his helmet off of his head and throwing it into the wall.

He's irritable and moody—more so than usual. Even his knights were avoiding him.

Fuck, even Hux has been keeping his distance.

Ever since his last visit with Evangeline, Kylo has found himself in a perpetual fog that clouds his judgment, making it impossible to complete even the simplest of tasks.

So much so that he doesn't give a blurrg's ass that he still cannot locate Rey after their confrontation in the desert.

All Kylo cares about is his Little Bird. He wants her more than he's capable of expressing.

His need for Evangeline is volatile.

The thought of being away from her for one more day makes him want to peel the skin from someone's bones and fry it in a pan.

But for all of his yearning, Kylo Ren can't find the words to confront Evangeline with his feelings.

He finds himself attempting to put pen to paper and write like he did when he was younger. Once upon a time, he poured all of his thoughts into countless journals, taking solace in the privacy they provided.

Ink and paper would never judge him for his tumultuous thoughts.

Except now, he can't find words that accurately describe what he wants to say to his Little Bird.

He tries time and time again. Each attempt he makes turns out clumsier than the last.

Nothing he's writing even begins to be remotely worthy of her.

Frustration simmers through his veins.

How hard is it to just SAY how you FUCKING feel?

It also doesn't help that Kylo feels selfish for even wanting to voice his desires to her.

Yes, he wants to ask her to be his Queen, but that doesn't mean he's worthy enough to be her King.

Being his Queen also means Evangeline would have to leave everything she knows and loves behind. Kylo's unsure he has the heart to ask that of her. He knows Evangeline cares for him, she's made that apparent time and time again—and yet...Kylo can't help but feel selfish for asking her for more.

He makes yet another mental list of the pros and cons of asking Evangeline to come away with him.

However, the list remains unchanging.

Cons:

-She could say no and the happiness they've established would be ruined.

-He could fail to make her happy and regret her decision to be his Queen.

-The Resistance, or any one of his other enemies, could use her against him.

-He would be asking her to leave her home planet, leave her Paradise Girls, and give up her dream of running Paradise House.

Pros:

-She could say yes, and they could be happy together until the end of time.

The con list is significantly longer, but that's because after the first pro, Kylo didn't need any other reason.