By The Time You Read This, I'll Be Gone

The End?

TRIGGER WARNINGS FOR WHOLE BOOK:

Contains swearing, suicide, depression, self harm, hatred, anxiety, and many other things. Read at your own risk.

It was an ordinary day, in an ordinary town. That's how this always begins, right? A normal town, a normal street, a normal family. Isn't there supposed to be a secret plot? A bad history, an abusive family? Something to give a reason to why this happened. To why she is gone, with only a letter.

Truth is, there is no scheme. It was a normal house, blue with brown shutters, and a loving family. A mom, dad, a teen girl and two kids, a boy and a girl, only twins. They were seemingly happy too. So how could this have happened?

It all starts with a letter. A goodbye. A note of love, and a note of hatred. It begins with loneliness and an ache to feel accepted. An overwhelming guilt, crushed with the sense of never going anywhere in life. It ends with the hospital, and a girl on the brink of life and death.

The first letter came three days after it happened. Three days she had been in a coma, struggling to make it through the pass. She had been found on the road, her arm and ribs shattered. She had jumped from a nearby cliff, onto the highway below. It wasn't a major cliff, but it was popular for suicide. She had been found by a couple returning from their hike, and rushed to the hospital, but there was no telling if she would be okay.

Seeing the envelope, sealed in wax because she always had a cheesy way of doing things, it nearly made Corine cry. Her lovely little cursive writing, which Corine had always teased her about. The hearts along the top of the paper, stamped on in perfect order, it broke Corine's already shattering heart. Every single word struck her with emotion, every line.

I don't know how to start a letter out like this. I mean, how does anyone? How do you say a goodbye to someone you love? I'm sorry love. I don't quite know how to end this as a goodbye. So I won't just yet. I know this has got to be difficult for you. My darling Corine, I loved every single second of life with you. From the minute I tripped over your legs in the hallway, to the lovely picnic we had on our hill. Every cheesy little moment, every hidden kiss, every loving picture. Please, never think that this happened because I didn't love you enough. I loved you more than the moon loves the sun, the fish love the sea, and how you just so happen to love me.

I won't end this yet. I love you too much to say goodbye to you yet. So when you are ready, return to our hill, near our tree. There is a box up on the swinging branch, and you will find your next letter there. For now, please know not a minute passed where I didn't love you. And I hope one day, you can forgive me.

~Eternally yours,

Lenia

It would be a week before Corine would go to their spot. She instead would sit with Lenia in the hospital, reading her books and telling her about school. When the night would die down, she would hold Lenia's hand, and she fell asleep with her head on her hand, praying to anyone that could hear her that her darling light would come back to her.