raison d'être // bellamy blake

xix. truth

Clarke had left only minutes before with Finn to try to call off the impending Grounder attack. Octavia, Bellamy, and I stayed with Lincoln and Nyko. I had put the gun into my waistband before moving to sit down, still aching from the earlier struggle with Lincoln.

I found a place farther away from everyone else, not wanting to raise concern for myself. Bellamy soon approached me, noting my demeanor.

"Kins-" he began to say, but I cut him off.

"Before you ask, I'm not fine. I haven't been fine. I just thought that eventually, things would go away, but they haven't," I admitted, covering my face with my hands and sighing. Bellamy's hand rested on the small of my back, rubbing small circles.

"I know you, Kinsley, better than you think. And you can't continue to push your problems away because they are not going to go away. But, we are all here for you. I'm here for you, always," Bellamy states, grabbing my hands and holding them in his.

I look at him, tears welling in my eyes. One tear escapes to slowly trails down my cheek. Bellamy slowly swipes his thumb, catching the tear. He then pulls me into his warm embrace, something I consistently yearn for. We stay like that for what feels like an eternity, yet was merely a minute. I pull away giving him a soft smile and he plants a soft kiss on my lips.

I turn and snuggle into him, laying my head on his shoulder, while his arms snake around me. I close my eyes, and give in to the rest I so desperately need.

────────

A while had passed, with no return from Clarke or Finn. Worry and slight panic began to set in. It only subsided when Finn burst in through the hatch.

"Oh, thank god. Where's Clarke?" asked Octavia as we watched him and Abby enter.

"Trying to stop a war," replied Finn.

Abby looked around at us before her eyes finally landed on Lincoln. She walked over to him to see how his condition was

"Pupils are unresponsive. Tie off his arm. Tight as you can," spoke Abby and Octavia complied.

"Thanks to the supplies your brother found, Lincoln might have a chance," she told Octavia.

"What's that?" questioned Octavia as Abby filled a needle with some substance.

"This will bring down his fever," she informed, before attempting to inject it into Lincoln's arm. Lincoln began grunting and attempted to thrash against his restraints.

"Hold him down!" she called out and Bellamy and Octavia moved to hold Lincoln.

"What's happening? Why isn't it working?" asked Octavia, once Abby had injected Lincoln. Abby held her hand up to his neck, checking for a pulse.

"His heart stopped," she spoke, before beginning chest compressions. By then, all of us had gathered around closer to Lincoln.

"You're their healer?" Abby asked Nyko, and he nodded. "Tilt his head back. Pull his chin down to open his airway."

All of a sudden, Abby stopped doing compressions, and I felt my heart drop.

"You're stopping. What's wrong?" questioned Octavia.

"I'm sorry. He's gone," she informed, making us all silent.

"No, it's not possible. You're wrong!" yelled Octavia, beginning compressions on her own.

"Octavia," Bellamy spoke softly, but she didn't acknowledge him. I put my hand on his shoulder, as I approached Octavia.

"Come back," she sobbed, repeating this over and over again.