Calm Me Down (girlxgirl)

twenty three: hurt

Upon my arrival, each general from each section stood up and bowed. I could tell they were all aware of what had happened, I could sense their deep fear as it lingered around the room. I made my way to the head of the table and sat down, they followed suit.

"There are more soldiers prepared for the war, and some from The South have joined our side in hopes that there would be fairness after our victory. However, some of them were found to be moles and have been giving Sir Bailey an insight of our situation. We have taken care of them, those that dare betrayed the crown have been hung as punishment" I closed my eyes holding in more rage i've felt since her.

"So now, Sir Bailey knows of our situation however, we have gained more soldiers and made new weapons that they do not know of" Another general spoke though my eyes were closed that I didn't know who uttered the words. I stood up and looked at the status of our kingdom through a sheet.

I shook any thought of her and focused on the matters on hand. "They know that we have blocked entrance of their kind in this area, but we must be prepared so i order for more guards to look out" I continued on and commanded each section to do a task. It took my mind off things as I came up with strategies for the war.

"Your Highness?" A voice called out and broke me out of my trance. I looked around as the room was empty, everyone had left and only Casie stood near me with her head bowed. I hadn't realised that I have been sitting in my chair for awhile in a trance. I stopped staring at the paper right in front of me and directed my gaze to Casie who returned her gaze back to me.

"Food is prepared, you must have something to eat" She whispered, her eyes were red and the eye-bags under her eyes became much bigger than they were. "I'm not hungry" I responded and stood up avoiding her figure, I was almost successful until she held my arms and pulled me back.

"Look she's gone and I don't know why and why she left without telling to me but she's gone Your Highness, we can't turn on each other too" I closed my eyes and but my lip to stop the whimper from slipping out of my lips, "You're all i've got right now" She whispered and leaned her head to my back. I took her hand and slowly ripped them off my waist and walked away without looking back.

I refused Maximus' order for me to eat and went straight to my chambers, locking the door and sliding down. I couldn't help but replay the last moments we had together, like a broken record that wouldn't stop playing no matter how much iI tried to stop. She found someone else for her, I wasn't enough and though it wouldn't have killed me like this if it was a month ago. But she changed me. I could feel Athena hide herself away and how i envied that she could do that and i was forced to stay and feel it all. I wanted Lamia as much as she wanted Lisa, i wanted to scream at the unfairness of it all. it was unfair how she came to my life when i was so content, she came in like a hurricane that somehow calmed me down.

She can't just make me different, you can't just make me different, and then leave. Because i was fine before, Lamia, I was just fine with me and you can't just calm me, make me different, change me and then leave.

I banged my head against the doorframe and dug my nails into my arms. I missed her scent, her hair, those eyes and how her voice just filled my day. I heard another knock and how i hoped it was Lamia wanting to come back to me but I heard Casie's voice on the other side.

"I know you don't want me here right now but i'm staying" A single tear rolled down the right side of my cheek as she sat on the opposite side of the door.

I wanted to scream for her to leave but i couldn't. Lamia's scent lingered on her. I could smell it if she is just a little close enough. She was right, we've only got each other now

•
one month later

"Please Your Majesty!" A lady plead in front of me, I looked down at her without remorse seeing her hold onto her bleeding son. He was no longer able to be saved anyway, there was already too much blood that left him.