Random One Shots

I Let Go (Dear Evan Hansen)

It was...

...it was a weird day.

That day was terrifyingly... odd.

First off, skip a year after the entire 'Connor Project'.

Jared was finishing his senior year now, and... it seemed like Evan and him were on okay terms now. Jared offered to give him a ride, so.

Here they were.

Awkwardly... in Jared's car.

"Guess the- uh... the car insurance paid off, huh?" Evan asked, really just wanting to break the tension that filled the car.

Jared shrugged. "I guess you could say that."

There was a bit more silence before Evan sighed. "Look, I know that I've told you probably a million times over the phone by now, and I know you read them you just didn't reply, but- I'm really sorry. For everything."

"I told you it's okay," Jared replied, shaking his head a little, focusing on the road in front of him.

"But it's not!"

They were at a red light, so Jared was able to look at Evan was a bit of a... fake-surprised expression. "What do you mean it's not?"

"I said the most shitty stuff to you!" Evan glanced back at him like he was insane. Wasn't that obvious? "And I knew that you were super insecure about it, but I was a- I was a massive bitch."

"Oh, no, seriously, it's fine," Jared said, focusing on the road again. "It's not like the one person I always went to to calm down and shit was an asshole. Or the person who was actually my really good friend back in first grade was a dick."

Evan sighed a little. "Can you please just accept my apolo-"

"No! Because you aren't sorry! I thought we established that already!"

"I- Jared, that's not tru-"

"Oh, really? So why is there a piece of you who is still glad it happened? Who still believes that he knew Connor Murphy, when all Connor had been was a jerk? Why are you still glad you got with Zoe, huh? Answer this: Evan. If you're truly sorry, and if you truly care, why the fuck did you blow me off!"

"I don't know!" Evan yelled, feeling tears come to his eyes as he gripped onto his jeans. "I don't- I don't know..."

"You'd think you'd do more than just text your apology, too."

"Jared, I'm sorry, I was scared-"

"And you think I wasn't?" Jared asked, glaring over at him since they were at another red light. "Do you know how fucking scared I was for you?"

"I- what... what do you mean?"

"Every decision you were making, you got further and further from the Evan I knew, and when you yelled at me in that computer lab? I was convinced you were gone," Jared replied. "And- goddamn Evan, was that your other way of doing it?"

"D-doing what?"

"Your arm," Jared said, his voice pretty much monotone. "I'm not stupid."

Evan's eyes widened with shock. Did he kn- how the fuck did he know? "Wh-what do you mean?"

"Nobody falls out of a forty foot oak tree on accident, Evan. At least when you're not that high, you're obviously an expert and know how to save yourself."

That's true.

Evan didn't know what to do- he really didn't, so he just... chose to snap. "I still don't know what the fuck you're talking about."

"How'd you break your arm? How'd you break your arm, Evan?"

He knew.

Jared knew.

Fuck.

"I fell."

"Oh really, is that what happened?" Jared asked, letting out a scoff.

"Yes! I fell out of the tree! I told you this already!" Evan yelled.

"Just fucking admit it!"

"I-"

"You didn't fall!"

"Fine!" Evan's eyes filled with tears, gripping onto his jeans even tighter than before as he felt one fall down his cheek. "I- I-"

...

"...I let go."

Jared reached their destination right after Evan said that, so when they pulled into park, he reached over to Evan and wrapped his arms around him.

Evan? Evan was just shocked. Because since when had Jared ever been nice enough to hug someone?

But it was comforting. To have him here.

"I'm so fucking sorry, Jared-"

"Don't apologize for that, it's not your fault," Jared replied, holding on tighter when Evan said that.

"I know, but- but if I was just a- a little stronger, if I-"

"Evan. Stop."

...

"It's not your fault." Jared sighed a little. "I could've been less of an asshole."

"Don't blame yoursel-"

"Then don't blame yourself, either," Jared interrupted.

"Jared..."

"You were right about one thing," Jared said, pulling away from the hug and looking at Evan. "You're my only friend. And I don't- I don't want to lose you."

"Family friend," Evan replied pretty quickly.

Jared shook his head. "Friend."

...

...

"You're my only friend too, then," Evan said, glancing over at him.

"I- I guess so."

"Can we start over?" Evan asked. "Just... reset? And be normal again?"

Jared thought for a bit before replying. "Yeah... yeah, we can."

A deep breath.

A few moments of silence.

"Thanks."

Words: 843