You, Me, Cock, Ass : YMCA Cowboy x The Dad From Inside Out

You, Me, Cock, Ass

YMCA cowboy rode his horse into a small town in the wild, wild west. The Small Town was called San Francisco. As he crossed the bay, going across the Golden red bridge, he thought to himself.

It sure is lonely, this cowboy life... if only I had someone to share it with.

He sighed, and refocused his thoughts on getting to the nearest gas station. His horse, Pixie Crack, drank only gasoline and ate spare tires on the back of Jeeps. If Pixie Crack didn't get food soon, she would surely buck him off – and then what would he do? San Francisco is no place for a cowboy – definitely not the YMCA cowboy. These rolling hills could hardly foster his nomadic lifestyle. Now. Where is the nearest Shell?

Meanwhile, in a car nearby, just a few streets over, The Dad from Inside Out pulls out of the driveway. He needs to get to work soon. After spilling coffee on himself, losing his keys, and ripping his favorite lucky pants (he has three), his morning was off to a rough start.

Dad checked himself out in the mirror. His brown little porn stache was glistening in the California sun. If his shirt was stained and pants shredded, at least his mustache would look good. That was the only reassurance he needed.

The Dad from Inside Out was 10 minutes from getting to work, when he noticed that his car was almost out of fuel. In any other landscape, he might push it, but these hills go up at a 70° angle, and no way in hell was he going to be pushing the car up, or run the rest of the way. Dad sighed, and turned left, pulling into the Shell around the corner.

YMCA Cowboy rode Pixie Crack into Shell. Her gentle trot was the only thing keeping him grounded to the present. He'd much rather be thinking back to his days in the figurative sun. Ol' San Fran has too much literal sun for his taste.

The heat beating down caused sweat to roll down his face in thick beads, getting caught in his mustache. His cowboy hat wasn't helping block out the sun much, eyes squinting just to maintain sight. Just then, he saw him.

Him.

At first, YMCA cowboy couldn't believe his eyes. Surely there wasn't a mirror? Was he being pranked?

The man in the white Subaru was the spitting image of him. Never in his life had he seen such a likeness. It came as such a shock to him, he hopped off Pixie Crack and ran over to the car. He knocked twice on the window, firm and quick.

Dad from Inside Out looked out his window, and assumed he couldn't see outside, because he only saw himself. He then realized he was not wearing a cowboy costume.

"WHAT THE FUCK????!!!!" He exclaimed. "Who are you?!"

YMCA cowboy signalled for Dad to roll down the window. "I'm the YMCA cowboy. I was just riding over to feed Pixie Crack over there–" he gestured to the silver horse "–when I noticed you through your window. Who are you?"

Dad lit up. "No way! Love that song!" There was something very intriguing about this man. "I'm the Dad from Inside Out."

YMCA Cowboy grinned. "That's my favorite movie. Do you actually have little people things in your head?"

Dad shrugged. "How the fuck would I know?" The pair laughed.

They stayed in a comfortable silence for a few moments, staring at each other. Cowboy was leaning against the passenger door, and looked back at Pixie Crack, who was licking a puddle of oil. "So..." Cowboy said. "Wanna get out of here?"

The Dad frowned. "I have work."

YMCA smirked a little, the corners of his mustache turning up. "So?"

The Dad from Inside Out sighed, and looked ahead. What was waiting for him at work? A regular 9 to 5 office job that he could get anywhere else. He wanted to quit, anyway. Pursue his dreams as a hockey coach.
Wait.
But...
What about his wife?
"I'm married," He said, holding up his left hand to prove it. There on his ring finger sat a dainty gold band.

"Who said I had intent of doing anythin' dishonorable?" He definitely had intent of doing anythin' dishonorable.

Dad sighed. Work wasn't worth today, and his marriage was failing anyway. Mom From Inside Out had been sleeping with Gabbie Hanna for weeks. "You know what? Why the fuck not? I'm in."

Cowboy's face split into an ear to ear grin. "You mean it?"

"Yeah, why not?" Dad smiled back. "But where will we go? And what are you going to do about Pixie Crack?"

Cowboy shrugged. "We'll think of somethin'."

With Pixie Crack literally sitting in the back seat of the car (it took a lot of blood, sweat and grease to squeeze her sweet ass in), they drove. To where? Neither was quite sure. All they knew is that they wanted eachother more than either had wanted anything before.

Cowboy's hand rested on Dad's knee, which was a very forward move all things considered. Feeling even more ball-sy, he slowly moved his hand up his thigh.

Dad from Inside Out pulled over onto the side of the road and they fucked into the sunset while the horse watched. Mega awk.

The End.