Down For The Count

Closure

It wasn't ideal to miss tonight, but this seemed a little bit bigger. I was going to bring my kid tea and let her lay in bed.

"I guess so." I heard Tommy sigh. "You're sure you don't want to be here tonight?"

I do want to be there tonight, but I need to be here instead. I've got the rest of my shows this week, I think I'll be fine.

"I'm sure. I'll be there super early tomorrow to make up for it." I tried to make things a little better.

"I'll hold you to that. Good luck with the emotional teenager."

I mumbled my thank you, ending the phone call with Tommy.

I finished making the tea, pouring some of it into a small cup and beginning my journey down the hallway to Paisley's bedroom.

I had hoped she would be upright by now, feeling a little bit better.

But she was still curled up in the exact same position. Her cries weren't nearly as loud though, they had gotten much quieter, but somehow I got even sadder watching the girl cry quietly to herself.

I walked over to the nightstand, setting the hot cup of tea down before I sat down on the edge of her bed.

"I brought tea." I said, hoping that would strike something in the girl. But she didn't seem to acknowledge my presence, much less hear a word of what I was saying.

"I'm sorry, kiddo. I don't know what's going on, but...but if you want to talk about it, I promise I'll listen."

But to no avail.

I got nothing.

I sighed, coming to the conclusion that I was getting no where as well as not helping anything. Maybe she just wants to be alone.

"I guess I'll go then. I called out tonight, so if you want to watch a movie or something-"

"What?" Paisley asked, quickly sitting up. I frowned at her teary eyes, her red and tear-stained cheeks. "No, don't do that. We can go, I'll go, I'm sorry."

"It's really okay, P, I can-"

"It's not okay. This is your last week, we should...we have to go." Paisley said firmly, beginning to get out of bed, but I stopped her.

"It's okay." I laughed, watching Paisley pause. "If it wasn't okay, I wouldn't have done it. Javi could use the practice anyway. Just sit back."

Javi didn't need the practice at all, actually. That role was practically molded for him, he's way too good at what he does.

But my words seemed to relax Paisley a little bit, and I watched as she sat back, leaning against the headboard of her bed as she sniffled.

"I brought tea." I told Paisley again, just in case she hadn't heard me earlier.

But Paisley only looked at the tea on the nightstand before looking away, her eyes falling down to her hands in her lap.

I wasn't sure why she wasn't drinking the tea until I looked down at her hands too, noticing they were shaking vigorously. Probably not ideal for holding hot tea.

"What's going on?" I asked gently, attempting to get some sort of conversation going. Trying not to pry, but hoping she would talk to me. Paisley looked up at me, her eyes still pooled up.

"I miss Alex." She spoke quietly, her voice coming out broken. "I miss seeing her. I miss...I miss everything about Alex. I don't even know how to be here without her."

I frowned, not sure what to really say. How can you say the right thing in a situation like this? How do you tell your daughter that everything will be okay when you know damn well it won't be?