𝐀𝐧𝐝 𝐈

𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐑𝐓𝐘-𝐒𝐈𝐗

"I ain't calling you my lord cause Ion want you to buy me da PS5.." He said eyeing me. "And da shit with your mom is about her and nobody else.."

"Have you talked to her?" I asked touching his face.

"Yeah, I talked to ha the other day.." He said.

"And what did she say? Did you ask about Laila? You probably didn't considering you don't like Laila but I want her to come here with me.." I explained as he rubbed my waist.

"Yeah, I'a go get her.." He said.

"You said that last time and you didn't go get her. If you don't want to go get her just say that.." I said.

"Ima go get her. I was busy and I forgot, Ima go get her though.." He said nodding. "Chill out.."

"I don't know, I feel weird.." I said standing up off of him and getting out of the bed. "Somethings wrong.."

"What's wrong Muga?" He asked looking at me.

"I don't know, I just feel weird.." I said pacing back in forth in front of the bed as I rubbed my arms. I felt my chest tighten up as I walked back and forth, my arms started burning and my hands started getting hot.

Tears slowly fell down my face as my ears grew hot and the back of my neck grew cold. I didn't know what was going on and why I was having one, but I knew I was having an anxiety attack.

"Muga," Dejhari called out before grabbing me, I smacked his hands off of me and moved back.

"Don't touch me!" I yelled.

"Ight but you gotta calm down. Ion even know why you all mad and shit.." He said as I rubbed my face.

"I-I don't know.." I said. "I don't know it could be the fact that my mother has abandoned me or the fact I've never been away from Laila for this long and I don't know, I'm anxious.." I explained as I rubbed my hands on my face slower.

"Ight, just take some breaths. Ima go get ha today.." He said, I took some deep breaths as he watched me. I felt myself starting to calm down but not fast enough.

"It's not working!!" I lashed out.

"Ight, uh- shit I don't know what the fuck ta do. Hollon.." He said grabbing his phone. "Where the fuck that book I bought you?"

I didn't reply because I was too focused on the fact that I was losing my mind. I paced the floor clawing my fingers into my arms as I cried.

"Hm, chew this gum.." He blurted out grabbing some gum out of his nightstand. He handed me the stick and I unwrapped it and put it in my mouth as I started chewing it.

"I know you sad about Laila but Ima bring her. I know it's hard fa you to be in a different place than home especially since you got Laila and shit so I apologize fa not bringing her when you first asked.." He said.

"I just want my Laila.." I said.

"I know, Ima get ha.." He said nodding his head. "Stop rubbing ya face like det, you ok.." He added.

I slowly moved my hand away and looked around.

I know that Dejhari will protect me but how can he protect me from myself?

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