A Year of Fics with Han

Our Clock is Ticking

Tae and his girlfriend had an awful Christmas. The holiday backfired resulting in harsh words thrown from both parties. After a bitter breakup they decide they won't start the year with one another. As the ball drops something strange happens, and the 31st starts all over again.

I pull my lips together in a frown, glancing down at the last text I sent.

'Merry Christmas I guess'

'Read at 1:34 am'

A deep sigh heaves from my chest. Yeah. Merry fucking Christmas and a Happy New Year. Stuck in an unfamiliar country in an unfamiliar town by my damn self. Guess we picked the perfect time to pick a fight. I bring my eyes to the clock. It's 5:00 pm on New Year's Eve. I could be at home with the rest of the boys but nooo. She had to drag me out to see her damn family and then pick a fight with me so I'm stuck spending the holiday alone.

My head falls back against the couch. What the fuck am I going to do now? It's already passed the new year in Korea, but maybe I'll call someone. Jimin... Yoongi. I don't know. What would I even say? Hey, Mara and I broke up yesterday, and now I'm alone on Christmas Eve. Tch. Yeah. As much as I'd love to spill my guts out to them I've cried so much this week I feel just like shit. At this point, I just want to fly back home.

Luckily I was able to snag a flight back to Seoul for tomorrow. Not that it didn't cost a lot, but there's no way I'm spending another day here to wallow in my self-pity.

The phone screen still shines up in my eyes and I look one more time. A tiny circular picture of her sits at the top of our text. Her tongue stuck out to touch the camera when I took the photo. Silly.

When I take that flight tomorrow, will I ever see her again? I grind my teeth together, my thumb pressing against the power button. Despite how much anger is burning inside me, I hope the answer is yes.

'I'll be happier if I lived this next year without you.' She really said that. I roll over onto my side, curling up on the cushions. She's probably right. I honestly did make everything harder for her. She was always so understanding though. I wonder if she even meant it.

I sniff, wiping at a stray tear I hadn't noticed. I'd like to think that she didn't mean it. That she was just angry and it spilled out after all the dumb shit I said. Or what maybe I didn't say. A shaky breath leaves my body, and my eyes clench shut. Oh, why can't I stop thinking about it?

Maybe she did mean it. I had never seen her say something with more conviction and anger, her body shook as she had screamed it at me. Her face had gone red like the wine we were drinking. I'm sure that fueled our anger too. But there had to be some backing behind her words. Even if this fight had been the last straw there were so many feelings leading up to this. Every night she spent waiting up for me. How could I not see her patience running out? Slowly but surely our clock had been ticking. Every time we greeted each other, said goodbye, kissed. Had her patience been running out then too?

Even I knew we weren't fine. Fuck. I should have said something. Maybe I didn't tell her how much she means to me often enough. Probably not. Of course, she cracked for the holidays. But did she really have to be so cruel?

I glance up from the couch, feeling the vibrations of a phone call. Damnit, I was hoping to avoid talking to anyone for the whole night. Should have figured, they are probably missing me. I sigh looking at the contact. Hoba hyung, a facetime. Not even just a voice call. Internally I groan looking myself in the reflection on my screen and making sure I don't look like the shit I feel like.

After a deep breath, I answer the call. "Heyyy hyung..." I try and push away everything that has happened. If I tell him he'll just be worried for no reason.