home

from the dining table

(i started writing this while heartbroken but it passed so i'm alright now)

waking up alone felt weird. i turned to my side and he wasn't there, no one there to say good morning. its been like that for the past month.

i grabbed my phone from the nightstand, 30 missed calls and 163 missed texts from payton, what happened.

i call, no answer
i call again, no answer
again,again,again, no answer

i now get a call from an unknown number,
"payton?"
"y/n?"
"payton please tell me what's wrong"
"y/n i-"
the phone call ended. i rush to my mum.

"no no no"
"what's wrong sweetie?"
"no no no" i start to breakdown in tears.
""y/n please tell me what's wrong" she starts to get worried.
"i think payton might be hurt"
i cry into her shoulder thinking about all the possible that's what could've happened to him.
"mum, we need to go see him"
"honey we can-"
"WE HAVE TO" i cut her off
"sweetie" she pauses, "we can't"
"yes we can why can't we we can"
"i got to work and you have to do school"
"just say i died and then when we know he is safe i just go to a different school"
"it's not that simple, don't worry darling, he is safe and in good hands"
"you don't care for shit" i just storm off

payton means the world to me and if he is hurt i have to see him. i'd never thought i'd be in love again but yeah.

a few weeks of planning

i had everything with me. i was ready to go. i love you mum and i'm not sorry for what i'm about to do, it's for the best.

as i stepped foward with million thoughts racing through my mind, i took a death break and...

"hello, welcome to hethrow airport, are you lost?"
"urm yes aha, where and when is the next flight to north carolina?" i smile awkwardly
"holy chizballs, follow me, we gotta go fast, you're leaving in 30 minutes!!"
"and isn't that enough time?"
"not with these queues, follow me and put these on, it will be you be a celebrity and people will let you through"
"now you shall address me as your majesty"

we got in one of those cart thingys
weeeee weeeeee this is so much fun weeeee
shut up y/n , your future husband might be dead. no let's not think if that. right let's start again, shut up y/n, your future husband could be hurt. there, much more better

"okay now your majesty"
"i was honesty joking about that"
"you're going to miss your flight if you don't get off, you do need to go three some security"
"argghhhh shit urm bye love yo-, wait"
"i love you too now go go go"

as i ran to security waffling on about how i'm really famous in germany and i need to get on this flight to north carolina so if he can do security check on me. thanks to these glasses, it worked.

last time i was on this flight, i was thinking about ways to jump off the plane but now, let's stay in this plane.

"oh so you're famous in germany?"
it was the person i'm sitting next to the next 9 hours.
"apparently i am, according for the front desk person"
"i- i'm dean"(it's the dean from gilmore girls)
"hi dean i'm y/n"
"so, how are you so famous"
"i'm one of the best models"
"i can tell"
as i pull out a book to read dean butts in again
"hey- i urh, think you're really pretty"
"thanks"
"moving on.."we both give an awkard giggle, "why are you coming here?"
"oh well" -sigh- "i'm coming out to see my b-" i just started thinking about all the possible things that could of happened. what if he really did die. i start to ramble to dean all about the phone call and how we met, i think i even mentioned the time a clown dropped my cotton candy and refused to buy me a new one so my mum took off the clown's wig and start running around with it.
"i totally get it, here's my number, so at least we can keep in contact, you seem like a pretty cool person y/n"
"that's because i am a cool person"

IM SORRY IT HAS BEEN A WHILE, I LEGIT DIDNT KNOW WHAT TO DO