2.Merry Go Round

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Warmth. I opened my eyes and got blinded by the fluorescent light, I blinked a couple of times. I was about to move my hand to scratch my eyes but I was rendered not to because I was tightly locked by an embrace.

I turn to the side and closely, almost kissing the tip of his nose. His visage is too peaceful and I was more secured by his arms. I felt like some precious gem that he'd never let go from holding, from keeping.

Looking at him, scrutinizing every features of his face. It only gives me more resolve to hold him longer, to never let him go.

I embraced back, I felt he snuggled more closely and I felt his heartbeat likely beating for me.

" Can we s-stay like this forever...? "
I whispered as my tear fell once more.

Ridiculous. Wishing for something impossible. I'm reminded of the uncountable times he's slept and flirt with anyone.

I should wake up from the fact that his love has been gone long ago.
It's getting harder to breathe so I tried hard to escape from his warmth and slowly get up----but was immediately pulled by him to lie again to the bed.

" Where are you going, Iruka.."
He uttered with closed eyes. He's half asleep.

I remained silent.
I waited until his grasp from my arm loosened, I gently pulled my arm away and his eyes opened.

I looked away.
He got up, scratched his hair then asked me,

" I asked you, where are you going..hmm? "

" I'll shower. "

" I already wiped you clean and changed you to your pajamas. You must be tired, you didn't noticed. "
He said as he beckoned and pulled me close to him.

" N-no.. I'm going out.. I mean, to the kitchen.."
I insisted but he only tightened his embraced and we lie to the bed again.

" Let's sleep more. "

" No."
I forcefully get up. And he got up too.
I scrabbled quick to stand but he's way quicker in pulling me again, he's leaning close to my face.

" No. " I expressed once more as I covered his mouth that's about to kiss me.

I hate it....
My emotions are surging up, tears are forming in my eyes again.

" L-let go..." I said coldly and he's only silent , indifferently looking at me.
I turned my face to avoid him from realizing that I'm near to crying.

" Why... are you crying, Iruka?"

And a tear fell to my eyes together as he leaned close again and claimed my lips this time successfully.

" No---Mmmph--!"
I protested but he never ceased and proceeded more to unbuttoning my clothes. I pushed him but he never budged.

Caressed.He rained kisses to my cheeks down to the neck. Intertwining tongues and kissing lips. And my tears never ceases from falling. My emotions weighed more than the pleasure.

" Kakashi.. n-no..."

His tongue trailed down to my chest, as his other hand is gently pulling down my pajamas.

How can you turn deaf and blind from my tears...

" Stop...s-top... touching me! "
I screamed desperately and there, he was likely back to the world and stopped finally.

How can you kiss and touch me after embracing someone else...

He didn't say a word. His stern and blank expression is piercing me.
I can't read him.
He's changed---so am I.

I cluttered as I fixed my clothes that's almost stripped by him.
And I felt his hand in my cheeks, he is wiping my tears with his thumb finger.

" ...What's the problem, Iruka.."
He isn't asking but likely more demanding an explanation from me.

I evaded my face and with a scornful face looked at him.
He didn't fazed at me.
He's calm.

So instead of saying anything, I chose to get up and leave the room without saying a word.

I get my sweater and umbrella.
It's almost dawn.

I went out, call a cab and directed to a friend's apartment.

I knocked several times until the door had opened.

It was Katoka, Kakashi's far relative. She's a close friend and we're closer than she's with Kakashi.

" Sorry for ...the intrusion.."
I gently said and she just realized it's me that she stopped blinking, widened her eyes in surprise.

"Holy Stars! What are doing here Iruka?! It's still dawn?! It's so cold, think about your condition! "
She screamed dramatically, she immediately let me in but as soon as I stepped in. I felt collapsing until my sight went black.

"Oh my god!! Iruka! Heyy!!! Iruka!! "

I'm glad she knew it all...

..........................

(TBC)

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