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- george's pov -
laying on my side, i jolted up from my bed and gasped for air from a bad nightmare. as i was sitting up on my mattress, i moved my duvet off my sweaty body while scanning my surroundings in the dark. taking in my environment, i realized that i was safe in my bedroom. then, i yawned loudly as began to wake up after startling myself. i reached over to the right side of my bed to grab my phone which was charging on my nightstand. after unplugging the charger cord from its slot, i lifted the device to my face. as i held my phone up, i let the bright light shine into my eyes. i wasn't fazed by my beaming screen since i was merely half asleep before waking up from my nightmare. instead, i was more shocked by the time. it was 4:13am on a wednesday morning, indicating that two whole days have passed from my last encounter with angel. every night since that monday sunrise, i have had vivid nightmares around 4am; the hour where i felt angel walk away from me. whether the bad dreams varied from childhood fears all the way to angel slipping away from my grasp, i always woke up in the middle of the night filled with trepidation.
to be completely honest, i was an absolute mess without my girlfriend. every day after monday morning began to feel the same, all the days passing by gradually became a routine. i would sob in sadness over the loss of my girlfriend from sunrise to sunset. i haven't left my room since the last morning i visited her. i haven't texted, called, nor responded to any tweets or messages my friends have sent me. i haven't opened discord nor teamspeak since the incident. i haven't been active on any social media. i haven't streamed on twitch in five days. i haven't showered. i barely went downstairs to greet my mother and enjoy her daily cooked meals. yet, to top it all off, i haven't gone one minute of my day without missing angel. i decided to go off the grid for awhile while i continued to sulk in sadness from angel's absence in my life. i never went to pick up my phone unless it was a dire attempt to call angel, in which i was always left straight to voicemail from my past 67 attempted calls.
however, i never gave up on her or the idea of her. i knew that the universe brought us together to begin with, so i only hoped that fate would pull us back together again. i knew it was a long shot, but the small amount of hope left within me gave me slight motivation to go day by day. although, i felt miserable without her. walking away from angel on her porch step that one morning physically and mentally tore me apart. i knew i disappointed her after i walked away, but what was i supposed to do? i cannot control every movement or comment my fans make. plus, kate blocked me oninstagram so i had no way to contact angel. in addition, with angel's voicebox always sending me straight to voicemail, it was apparent that my girlfriend wasn't active on social media either. but, i just wanted to see her; even if it was for a second. i simply wanted to stare into her kind, brown eyes out of admiration in hopes of feeling my heart pitter patter out of my chest once again. all i desired was to feel happy, but i knew that emotion was hard to achieve as angel, my main source of happiness, was gone.
