I opened my mouth to speak when I heard another voice chime in. "Lix! Sorry I... Chan Hyung?!" I heard Chan squeal as I saw him jump into Jisung's arms. The two seemed to embrace for a few seconds. I felt a pain in my heart as I watched them hug before he pulled away. Jisung looked at him gleaming as I suddenly noticed something that I wish I hadn't. My eyes immediately darted to his left ring finger where a sparkling diamond ring sat.
"Are you engaged...?" I asked quietly. I didn't want to be rude but I had a feeling that I already knew the answer. I felt my heart physically break while tears filled my eyes as I saw him nod slowly. I faked a smile and said "Congrats man!" as I gave a nod and fist bump. That was all I could do. I laughed it off and quickly looked at my shoes, rapidly blinking trying to keep from crying.
Jisung seemed to notice my mood change as he quickly spoke up. "Congratulations! Well, Felix and I should be headed out. We have a bunch of practice to do tonight and we have to beat each other's asses in video games." I looked up to see Chan gazing at me sadly as he nodded understandingly. He pulled Jisung into another tight hug before turning to me and opening his arms slightly. I wrapped my arms around his beautiful figure. His breathtaking scent filled my nostrils as he squeezed me tightly. I never wanted to let go.
"Take care of yourself..." I said as I pulled away. We did our best friend handshake before she leaves.
"Bye guys." His sweet voice filled my ears one last time before I saw him turn and continue walking the opposite way. I felt a small tear fall from my eye as Jisung placed a hand on my shoulder squeezing in reassurance. "I'm sorry man...." He spoke softly. I wiped my eyes as my knees started to give out.
"I don't know what the hell I'm doing." I said as the exhaustion took over.
"Let's get home." I only nod. I had no more natural source of ecstasy, my body was now completely accustomed to the regular amount I took and I felt broken. We walk to the car and get in. The radio quietly played in the background as I drove to the JYP building. I parked in my space and we quickly headed to the dorms. Once we walk in, I walk over to the fridge and get a bottle of beer.
I down the bottle in one chug causing Hyunjin to rush over to me. "Wow! Slow it down!"
"Can't..." I sit down at the kitchen table after grabbing another one. I chugged it again. Feeling the strong drink run down my throat and make all the pain go away.
"What's wrong with you?" He asks. He starts making himself dinner as I sit there staring at my bottles.
"Saw Chan today... Learned he was engaged." I answered.
Hyunjin lets out a small sigh as he continued cooking. "That's real-life. I don't know what else to say."
I groaned and stood up to grab another beer. I hate being sober. It makes me feel like a child. I grabbed another one and downed it in less than a minute.
I hear Hyunjin say "You should stop drinking. It's becoming a habit and we really hate seeing you this way."
"It's fine. Just need to focus on practice." I replied.
"Why don't you go talk to him?"
I smirk and have another drink. "Easy said than done."
BANG CHAN'S POV
I walk to the house and my head was screaming Felix's name. It was telling me to turn back and speak to him but I just couldn't. I still loved him. I have no idea why I was with Ryujoo. Was it to get rid of the pain? If that's so what does it make me? I saw the disappointment in Felix's eyes when he learned I was engaged. Does he perhaps like me back? I walk into the house with the thoughts still running through my head and hear Ryujoo yell from the kitchen "And where the fuck were you?"
Until it's gone
Start from the beginning
