Merry Christmas, Angel

I Forgive You

It wasn't till almost eight am that Crowley came out of their sleep like state. Considering they had entered it around midnight this may not sound that long, but for a demon this was a good chunk of time to have allowed to skip pass them. They would have stayed in it longer, but the morning sun was entering through a shop window and assaulting the side of their face. Crowley let out a groan and went to stretch. That's when they realized the heavy weight, but not unpleasant weight on their lap along with the warmth pressed against their chest. What in the name of Satan? The ancient serpent blinked twice and the memories of earlier come rushing back to them. They mentally chastised themselves for having let their guard down to such an extent. There would be no living this one down. Maybe if they closed their eyes they could enter back into a sleep state for the next oh.....Two billion years. Couldn't be that hard. Despite not needing to do so sleeping was one of the demon's favorite actives. Crowley once managed to sleep through an entire century and was rather proud of it too. It takes a certain talent to do that or at least this is what they claim. In two billions years Aziraphale will have forgot all about this and they can go back how things should be.

Crowley frowned. Aziraphale......The being who was STILL on their lap and still very much in a sleep state of their own. Did that mean Crowley hadn't made a complete ass of themself? Did it mean the angel felt something for them too? Not that Crowley was admitting to feeling any thing. Demons don't get feelings for others. It just doesn't happen. Then again demons don't go against Satan, help save the world and befriend angels now do they? No, they certainly don't.

By the same logic angels surely don't take extended naps on the laps of demons. If they happened there would be serious problems. It'd be going against everything the universe has set for such beings. Still, here they are doing the one thing both always have done best and breaking every rule that applies to their kind. The snake of Eden knows what they should do. They should push Aziraphale off their lap and leave the shop right now. But when has Crowley ever done a thing they should do? They have always been a selfish demon. Rather than following orders and behaving as a proper demon, Crowley does as they want. Their actions are based on what they want and doing what pleasures them. At least this is the big old lie they  tell themself, but if this is so than why did they come here last night?

If they are truly as selfish as they claim to be why for the love of Satan did they feel it necessary to be around Aziraphale on Christmas? Why would they stop drinking and try to spend time helping someone enjoy a day they loathed more than anything in the world? Why had they felt anything even close to guilt over the angel being alone on Christmas Day? None of the answers to these are acceptable to Crowley. Each answer points to them not being nearly as selfish as they claim. It all points to a truth both have been avoiding for thousands of years. They care about one another. Deeply. The fact that Crowley finds themself so......Content with Aziraphale on their lap is concerning. There is an emotion attached to it that the demon hasn't felt since their fall from Grace. They know damn well what that emotion would be called by humans. "love".

Even mentally saying the word feels wrong. It's impossible. Demons don't have emotions let alone feel love. Still, it feels good being this near to someone. It feels right. Another things don't do. They don't do right things. They do wrong things. Crowley frowned. What's it matter what demons or angels do to them anymore? Neither on Heaven or Hell's side any longer! They are on their own side and they should be making their own rules. Not letting the ways of the old hold them back any longer. Was that part of what saving the world was all about? Realizing that it was time to stop playing by rules which made them both miserable and start making their own choices. So what was the ancient serpent's choice going to be in this new mess they are in? Fuck if they knew. This was uncharted territory. Letting out an inaudible sigh Crowley rested their chin against Aziraphale's shoulder. It didn't register for the demon that they seeking comfort from the one being knew would offer it up. Truth be told, it didn't register to Crowley what they had done at all until afterwards. Crowley was going to pull their face back and in all likely hood disappear from the shop before Aziraphale could realize a thing, but it was too late.