Impossible | | La Casa De Papel

1.8

*trigger warning*

I was trying to gather my broken pieces and get up to find Nairobi as Berlin advised. A task kind of hard after 1 and a half bottles of  pure tequila. I hadn't eaten or slept in days. Not that anyone else had, but after the heartbreak my system was not at its best. I slowly managed to go to the basement where Nairobi was supposed to be. As I was passing by one of the vaults I heard screaming and moaning. Rio and Tokyo were the first ones to come to my mind, but then I reconsidered and thought that it was a busy time and that they would both be busy. Next my mind went to Berlin, fucking some hostage maybe but I declined the thought for the first reason.

When they say the curiosity killed the cat, they really mean it. I wish my stupid mind weren't that drunk and curious enough to open the huge door securing the vault. The sight before my eyes was something i had never encountered before. Even if my ex boyfriend was as shitty as anyone could think, he never cheated. Monica Gaztambide pressed with her front on a wall screaming. Behind her: My boyfriend, my best friend, my comrade in this madness, Denver. Pounding into her merciless, as he used to do to me, moaning her name the way he used to moan mine. Them of course having the time of their lives, were too busy to notice me.

SICILIA:"I hope you two are enjoying yourselves" I calmly said in order not to let myself cry.

The second words came out of my mouth they both stopped and tried to cover themselves as I was turning my back to them and leave this nightmare. Denver was quick to sun after me before I managed to leave the vault and grabbed my hand. I harshly pulled in out of his grip and used it to slap him hard.

SICILIA: "Don't even dare to touch me again.", I said calmly but seriously giving him a death glare.

I exited the vault and run upstairs to the office. I stepped inside, locking, without even checking if I am alone or even If Denver followed me. But again why would he? He has company. At this thought, I cracked. I took a deep breath and started screaming, I grabbed some pillows from the couch and threw them to the other side of the room, I grabbed the tablecloth and pulled it shattering everything on the table, resulting in some pieces of glass to shatter near me and poke me. I flinched at the sudden pain but then an old habit seemed to knock on my door. I hated betrayal. I hated it more than anything. Everyone in my life betrayed me. My parents, my old friends, my ex boyfriend, Denver...I was useless, It was a matter of time before I did something stupid, sent the plan to hell and again be betrayed by the professor and the band. With these thought, still crying like hell, I grabbed a piece of glass, unzipped by overalls and brought it down my knees, leaving me with my boots, my black simple panties and a small black t shirt, I sat down next to the chaos I had created and placed the glass on my thighs. Touched my right thigh with the glass pressing lightly. The moment the first drop of blood appeared, my eyes filled with new tears. With the first hint of pain i felt better, I felt like I deserved it, I must be doing something so wrong that everyone leaves me. I slowly dragged the glass along my thigh leaving a long red line of blood. My lips were shivering and my eyes filled with tears. I lifted the glass, took a deep breath and kept on doing the same thing. With each cut my rhythm increased, until I was wildly and restlessly cutting both my thighs. I was crying unstoppably feeling like shit for backsliding to my old habits. What I hadn't thought were the cameras we had in the room for professor to check on us...

As I was laying almost fainted due to the loss of blood I heard a very loud knock on the door.

BERLIN: "SICILIA!!! Que cojones estas hacento alli?" he said bumping on the door to break it down

SICILIA: "Ehh...No..No...Nothing Be..rlin. Nothing, I am...I am just resting" I said trying to put my clothes back and to clear all the blood

BERLIN: "NO SOMOS ESTUPIDAS SICILIA. THERE ARE FUCKING CAMERAS IN THEREQ STOP WHATEVER THE FUCK YOU ARE DOING AND OPEN THE MOTHERFUCKING DOOR! YA!"