'I don't know what I'm going to do tomorrow.' Clarke let out a sigh. Her head was spinning. Multiple thoughts on what could happen. Would she be the new target? Would they take her back? Would Lexa still be her friend if she went back. 'No matter what I'm right beside you.' Lexa said. She looked at Clarke. She could see the girl's worries. 'What if they take me back.' Clarke said softly. 'If they take you back and if you want to go back you're going back.' The brunette walked over to her desk where the last cookies lay. 'But I don't want to lose you.' The blonde started crying. Lexa quickly made her way over to Clarke. She pulled the blonde in. Clarke's head in Lexa's shoulder. 'Hey shhh. You won't. If it's what you need I'll pretend we're not friends at school. You can even yell at me.' The brunette rubbed circles on the blonde's back. 'Would you do that for me?' The blonde asked. Her voice was raspy from crying. Lexa grabbed a glass of water for the blonde. 'Of course I would Clarke. I would steal the moon for you.' The blonde laughed.
'Hey have you thought about the girl thing?' Lexa asked softly, trying to not scare Clarke with her sudden question. 'Well. It's pretty scary to me. It's just. I don't know.' Clarke tried. 'It's okay, no pressure, but may I ask who the girl was?' Lexa asked. 'Yeah but promise me that nothing absolutely nothing changes. Please.' The blonde looked up at the brunette. 'Of course not.' Lexa's heart hoped it was her but her head knew it wasn't. What she doesn't know is that it's her. Clarke has a massive crush on the brunette. Clarke didn't know whether to tell the truth or make up a whole crush. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. 'It's you Lexa.' She whispered. 'It's you.' She said now louder. She looked in Lexa's eyes. Clarke stood up ready to leave. Clarke didn't think Lexa likes her back, but the thing is, she does. A lot. Lexa's eyes dropped from Clarke's eyes to her lips. She was stunned, confused. Her mouth opened a little. Trying to say something but she couldn't think of anything. 'Lexa I'm sorry I should-' The blonde stumbled over her words. 'Can I kiss you.' Lexa blurted it out. She didn't mean to say this. 'Fuck sorry.' Lexa now stuttered. The blonde's heart began to pump harder. Her eyes widened when she heard these words. A part of her was scared, but she mainly wanted to kiss the girls so bad. 'Yes.' She managed to stutter out. The brunette grabbed her waist. Pulling her closer. She pressed her lips on the blonde's. The kiss was full of desire, passion, heat. The blonde felt sparks everywhere. The butterflies in her stomach went crazy. She felt her heartbeat rise even more. It was finally happening. The brunette wanted to do this since the first time she laid eyes on the blonde. Lexa pushed Clarke towards the bed. They laid down. Lexa was on top of Clarke kissing her. Slowly moving to her neck. Leaving trails of kisses. Her hands went to the bottom of her shirt. Trying to take them off but Clarke stopped her. Lexa quickly let go off her shirt and went back to kissing her neck. 'I'm sorry.' Clarke said. Nearly crying. 'Hey it's okay. I'm ready when you are.' Lexa laid down next to Clarke. Clarke got flashbacks from last year. She started crying. She tried to forget about it. 'Hey Clarke what's going on? I don't understand why- I won't leave you for this.' Lexa's mind was racing what was going on. She had many thoughts. 'It's not you.' Clarke said.
(tw sexual assault)
'Screw it you know everything.' The blonde said with a sad laugh. Lexa looked at the blonde. 'Last year.' The blonde started. 'I was dating this guy Finn.' She swallowed visibly. 'He wanted more than I wanted.' Lexa knew where this was going and she felt so bad. Not her. Not Clarke. 'No.' Lexa said softly. Clarke nodded. 'He he grabbed my waist and and pushed me against the wall. I told him to stop. Multiple times, but he didn't. He took off my clothes while holding my wrists so I couldn't move. I was still wearing my underwear when I started to scream. My mom came in and stopped him.' The blonde collapsed. Lexa caught her. 'I'm so sorry Clarke. If I see that son of a bitch I'll end him.' Lexa said with anger. 'There's nothing to end.' Clarke said softly. 'What do you mean?' Lexa asked. She was concerned about what happened next but she didn't show it to Clarke. She needed to be strong for her. 'My- my mom killed him.' Lexa gasped. 'I know.' The blonde closed her eyes. She bit her lip and let the tears stream down her face. 'Where's your mom now if I may ask?' 'Also dead. She died in prison. She was already sick and she wouldn't survive longer than 2 months, that's why she decided to kill him I guess.' Lexa was in shock. The blonde went to all this alone. With pretending to be fine. Lexa's head was racing. There were so many thoughts. 'Can you hold me?' The blonde asked. Her voice sounded vulnerable. Lexa slid under the covers and put her arms around Clarke. 'Of course.' She whispered in Clarke's neck. Lexa's whisper sent shivers through Clarke's spine. Lexa kissed Clarke on her cheek. This made Clarke smile. 'I don't want to go too fast.' Clarke whispered. 'Please don't leave me over this.' The blonde added. 'I like you too much to leave you over this.' The brunette said in a sleepy voice. The blonde quickly fell asleep.
The next morning Lexa woke up first. Seeing the blonde sleeping in her arms made her smile. Lexa kissed Clarke on her cheek. Clarke hummed. 'Good morning.' Clarke groaned and Lexa laughed at the blonde's reaction. 'School day.' Lexa said. The blonde threw a pillow at her. Telling her to shut up. 'Come on.' Clarke dragged Clarke off the bed. Clarke fell on the ground because she refused to stand up. She dragged the pillow and blankets with her. 'You're such a child.' The brunette laughed. She lifted up the blonde bridal style and walked downstairs. 'Good morning girls.' Lexa's mother said. She glared at her daughter who was holding a girl in her arms. 'She refuses to stand and I don't want to be late because of this grumpy cat.' Lexa said it like this happened everyday and her mother laughed. 'I'm not grumpy!' 'Aww baby Clarke is angry.' Lexa teased. Clarke playfully hit her. Lexa threw Clarke on the couch. 'I made you guys some pancakes.' 'Thanks mom.' Lexa said. They ate in silence but it wasn't awkward at all. Lexa was looking at how cute Clarke ate her pancakes. 'I'm gonna miss hugging you today.' The blonde said. Lexa chuckled at the blonde's reaction. 'I'll hug you twice as hard when we're finished.' Lexa said. She saw the grin appearing on Clarke's face. Oh no. 'Is Lexa Woods who beat up Bellamy Blake desperately asking me to come back to her house after school.' 'Hey I'm not the one who is going to miss the hugging.' They both laughed. Lexa loves to see Clarke smile. It's so pure. 'If I yell at you I don't mean anything by it ok?' 'I know Clarkie. It's okay.' The nickname made Clarke's heart skip a beat. Hearing that coming from Lexa's mouth was just so perfect.
'Why are you hanging out with the new girl.' Octavia asked. 'Please Octavia it was a one night thing. I had a breakdown. I'm over it now.' The blonde hoped this would work. That they would take her back. 'Prove it.' She texted Lexa "ask me if I'm okay irl I need to prove something. I'll yell at you but I don't mean it." "On my way." The brunette loved doing this for her whatever they are right now.
'Hey Clarke are you okay?' The brunette lightly touched the blonde's waist. 'Stop touching me! This was a one night thing!' Clarke yelled. 'But Clarke?' Lexa said calmly. 'Stay away from me!' The blonde yelled. She pushed Lexa away and went into the classroom. Octavia glared at her. Raven just went inside. Bellamy followed them. 'Do you want me to beat her?' Bellamy asked with a grin on his face. 'This is not your revenge Bellamy.' Clarke coldly said. She hated yelling at the brunette. She didn't want this anymore. Even though Lexa knew this was planned she doubted if Clarke actually wanted to be friends with her. 'You're back in.' Octavia simply said.
Later that day during lunch break Clarke went outside. She saw Lexa leaning against a tree. Tears in her eyes. Clarke looked around, her friends weren't here. She rushed to Lexa. 'What's going on?' Clarke asked. 'Am I really a one night thing?' Lexa asked her voice cracking as she said those words. 'No of course not! I need you.' Clarke replied. 'Look I have to go but I'll see you at your place ok?' Lexa nodded and the blonde went back inside.
That afternoon at Lexa's they talked and promised to not let each other go. What they had was special and they wanted to keep it. 'Lexa do you want to be my girlfriend?'
'Of course I want to.' The blonde smiled.
