Cigarettes

Chapter 30

Layla's POV

"-You remind me I'm alive. You remind me I can live again." Luke said and smiled insecurely, like he was afraid if he laughed something bad would happen.

I never liked crying in front of other people but with Luke it just didn't seem to work. The tears were streaming down my face and I didn't know if they were happy or sad tears.

I wanted to slap Luke but I also wanted to hug him and I wanted to kick him but also wanted to kiss him.

If I tried to say anything it would've probably come out as a moan so I stayed quiet. Instead, I squirmed closer to him until the sides of our bodies touched.

Then I leaned my head on his shoulder as he took both of our holding hands into his lap, tracing invisible lines on my palm with his other, free hand.

"Luke," I started finally after a few minutes of silence. "I l-" I coughed. "I appreciate you telling me this."

Luke didn't say anything back and we were like that for a couple of minutes. He was still squeezing my hand and honestly, I would mind if he let it go.

"You should really eat those candy you bought, it will dissolve." Luke chuckled after a while and I brought my head back up from his shoulder.

"I forgot!" I breathed and reached for the paper bag that was laying next to me on the bench. Then I made a face and turned back to look at Luke.

"Luke, it's freezing outside. How can it dissolve." I asked rhetorically and Luke giggled.

"Oh." He said. "I'm so warm I didn't even notice the temperature."

"Well I'm feeling it. Look." I said and put my hand that Luke wasn't holding onto his neck as Luke instantly winced and absorbed his head into his shoulders.

"Why is it cold!?" Luke yelled surprisedly and I started laughing.

"Because it's winter! And my other hand is warm because you warmed it up." I don't know why I felt the need to let him know that but I still said it anyway. "Can we go home now?"

"I want to sit here for a little bit more." Luke looked at the ocean and I couldn't help but stare at his profile.

"But I'm cold." I whispered, not really wanting to make him go home if he doesn't want to. I really wanted to do anything Luke wants to do at the moment because I felt like he deserved everything he wanted. It wasn't out of pity, I just felt the strong need to make his wishes come true. I just wanted to see him smile.

"Then let me warm your other hand up!" Luke whined and I couldn't help but start laughing again. Luke turned to me to reach out for my hand but then stopped as he looked at my face.

"Your cheeks are still stained." He said quieter than before and I felt my cheeks heat up.

Luke let go of my hand that he was holding and wiped my cheeks with his thumbs. Then he looked at me for a while and booped my nose.

"Hey, you're right. This is fun!" Luke's face lit up as he started smiling widely. It was contagious so I smiled too.

"Forget it, you're really freezing. Let's go." Luke stood up from the bench and put his hand out for me to take.

"We don't have to go if you don't want to." I protested but Luke shook his head.

"Come on." He wiggled his fingers, reminding me I have to take his hand and stand up.

I grabbed his hand and he pulled me up from the bench, spinning me around like a ballerina. I then stood in front of him and looked up at his face.